Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Remembering...

Alvesgaspar Photo (Source)
When I wrote this, I had just returned from visiting hours for a friend. For those of you who don't know what that means, think wake, think paying one's respects, think...

Good Lord, I don't know what to think right now.

Her name was Lori. She had been suffering from a nasty debilitating disease for a long time, yet the last time I saw her, she looked so much better. It seemed, to me at least, that she had turned some corner, was on the road to recovery.

Then last week, she went to sleep...

Ne'er to awaken in this world.

The last time I saw her was at the funeral for her husband's grandmother. A little over a month ago. The same place where her visiting hours were held. Irony doesn't begin to describe the situation. Like her oldest son (a dear friend and a good man) said, "We need to start seeing each other other places. Anywhere but here."

She was only 52. She leaves a husband who is also a dear friend and who has enough pain in his life to sink many a lesser spirit. He is fighting cancer, he and Lori have struggled mightily in past months.

She leaves three fine children, the youngest in his late teens, a fine grandson and a fine son-in-law.

The Missus Herself and I have been friends with this family nearly since we arrived here in Little Rhody. Lori's father-in-law Fred was the pastor of the church where we are members now, a fine man, I have written of him before. Her mother-in-law is a fine lady and one of our very best friends here in Little Rhody.

Really, I consider that whole family to be dear friends, as near as family can be without the actual blood ties. Their pain is my pain.

Please pray for Brian and his family. They are worthy of that.

What is it about this day in January (the 25th as I write) that seems to draw me into melancholy?

I wish I knew. No doubt it's simply coincidence. Then again, the 30th of January is the day of Saudade in Brazil. Note the date on that post.

Yup, 25 January.

Here and here as well. These posts were from the 25th of January as well.

I remember, I mourn, yet I celebrate the memories of those who have gone before, I am richer for having known them.

Rest in peace dear Lori, we won't soon forget you.

Nor those you've left behind in our care.




30 comments:

  1. about 12 years ago, my wife lost a loved one within a week of her birthday. It happened every year for a while. She was gun shy for quite a while after that. She would begin to be depressed a few weeks before her birthday. Took years to get over that.

    I'm not sure how, but there is some subconscious emotional tie to anniversaries.

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    1. Yes, I understand that and I think your last point makes a lot of sense.

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  2. Hang in there Sarge.

    We can't even come close to describing how wonderful and rewarding and fulfilling our personal relationships are. The words don't exist. The magic is literally beyond our ability to understand. Likewise, when we lose friends, the pain and anguish are really beyond description as well.

    Which brings to mind the footprints in the sand parable.

    Thoughts and prayers.

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  3. Ditto with the "Hang in there"

    We'll keep her and her family in our prayers.

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  4. Replies
    1. Thanks Joe, I really feel bad for the family.

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  5. Remember, in times like these, that there is a Badger in Wisconsin, banging away on his computer in his burrow, and drinking hot apple cider, who thinks quite highly of you. You writings show you to be a thoughtful, thinking man, and even more importantly, a Good Man, ( note Caps ) Take comfort in the knowledge that you will meet your loved family and friends that are missing again, God will see to that.

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    1. I do know that Scott and it is a comfort.

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  6. I'm saddened because you are, Sarge, and would gladly sit and keep you company, if I could. These things are never easy, are they?

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    1. If life was easy it would be less interesting, I think.

      We live, we love, we learn.

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  7. What can I add?
    Your words are a tribute to the individual and the friendship...
    ...and my condolences.

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  8. Sarge, I am so sorry for your loss. I am facing the same thing with a friend (not as close as yours but a friend nonetheless). She's 52 also, nearing the end of her 2+ year battle with colon cancer. It's awful, you feel so powerless. Just keep tabs on your friends; life goes back to normal quickly for everyone but those who grieve...hugs to you. And prayers for God's comfort and strength.

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    1. Thanks Kris. I'll offer a prayer for your friend. I also know what this day means to you. Keeping you in my thoughts as well.

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  9. My condolences, too. I'm glaring at cancer myself (not in me, in others, family and friend.) It needs to stomped out, like we're doing with polio.

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  10. My thoughts and prayers for your friend's family. It seems that far too many of us are experiencing the same thing within our own little circles.

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    1. Yes, this getting older thing has its pitfalls.

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  11. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. It's definitely one of the tougher
    parts of life and one that we face more often as we get older! It definitely makes
    me appreciate the friends that I have left even more.

    I got a call Sunday morning at 5:30 from the wife of my best friend and fishing partner.
    He had just been taken to the hospital and was in ICU with a ruptured aorta. He is still
    in ICU and I'm praying that he makes it though this.

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    1. I'll add my prayers for your buddy. Thinking positive thoughts here.

      Please keep us posted Russ.

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  12. I think you found the truth in your post last year. "I do not fear death...." We mourn the ones we know and miss, but faith in a life everlasting keeps one guessing up to the end, and, if we're right, that's enough. My thoughts, prayers and condolences.

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  13. One of my brother-in-laws has colon cancer now in remission. Every time the phone rings and his number or that of his mother (she's 89 herself) shows my wife fears the worst.
    Life in old age ain't no picnic...hope all turns out well..

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    Replies
    1. As the adventure continues, I mourn the ones who can't continue on. But I remember them. Always.

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  14. Sorry to hear, and prayers for her family.

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  15. Dang Sarge, that sucks. We've all lost friends is the past and will again in the future, that's the nature of the beast. I don't know if it's true but it seems like I've lost more than my share, aviation is a cruel mistress. It didn't take many funerals for me to realize two things. Celebrate the life instead of mourning the death. (Otherwise the grief will drive you crazy) And "seize the day" None of us is guaranteed a tomorrow, do it today. Stay strong buddy.

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Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)