Hoop Jumping 101

 Well, Campers....It's been an "eventful" (eventful being a Swahili word for stressful) couple of weeks as we (AKA Mrs. J) went through the final preparations for our Mediterranean Cruise scheduled for sailing on 15 Sep.  

Royal Caribbean's Vision of the Seas (AKA Our Ship)
Source

A complicating factor in that plan is that we sail from Barcelona, Spain.

Oh, boohoo, juvat.  Sailing from Barcelona, one should be so lucky.

You're absolutely right, Sarge, However, the feckless (substitute any curse word you feel appropriate for feckless) bureaucrats have gone way beyond their normal abilities to screw things up.  Now it appears they have superhuman abilities to do so.

No, Beans, this is a family friendly blog.  The word you're thinking of doesn't pass that goal post.  It's true, just not family friendly.

You see, because of the Black Plague that descended on us this past year or so, one must be fully vaccinated against it or have had a test to ensure you're not currently suffering from it.  

As far as that goes, no big deal.  Having the Black Plague and boarding a relatively closed in, crowded cruise ship could be detrimental to the well being of the passengers, many of whom are, well....Let's just say they make Old Air Force Sarge, look like a young'un. 

Anyhow, as always when dealing with feckless bureaucrats, the devil is in the details.  MBD, SIL and MG are traveling with us.  MG is too young for vaccination, MBD and SIL, being more socially active (e.g. having more people to interact with) than Mrs. J and I living on Rancho Juvat , had come into contact with someone who had contracted the Black Plague . We thought the booster requirement had to be taken more than 14 days prior to embarkation and that would not have been enough time elapsed for them to get the booster administered.  Leaving them with the only option being a negative test requirement in order to board.  

On the Mrs. J and my side of the issue, we tried to get the booster, but there was none to be had in our local area. So, we were left with the "negative PCR test" as our requirement to board. Oh, and a "home" test kit, doesn't count. It's got to be administered by someone (e.g. $$)

But, the feckless bureaucrats had to have their finger in that pie also, even more so.  The test had to be administered within 72 hours of boarding.  Now Barcelona is 7 hours ahead of us and we board at 1300L on Sep 15.  Which means we can take the test any time after 0430L our time on 12th. 

No problemo, right?

So we start making the rounds on Friday finding out who's got enough test kits for us to take the test.  HEB doesn't have any. Nor does our Doctor's office.  Urgent Care does, but. this isn't urgent.  Walgreens does and as we're talking to them about making an appointment for the 12th, we happened to ask this question.

"When will we receive the results?"

"Oh, it'll take 2-3 days before we send them to you."

Our travel plans are to fly out of Austin the evening of the 13th, arrive in Barcelona on the 14th, use that extra time for insurance if something goes wrong with travel or, do a little sightseeing.  

So...Suffice it to say,  many unkind thoughts were flowing through my brain on the way home.  Once I get my blood pressure somewhat back to normal, I ask Mrs. J what the plan is.  She being the Travel Agent.

"I don't know."  didn't help, much.  I thought, well if we cancel. at least I'll have some time to spend in my workshop.

We get back home, I disappear into my workshop and began turning fine hardwood into sawdust because not much else is relaxing to me. Meanwhile, Mrs. J retires to her office.  A while later, she comes out and asks me to log into my email and read a document she'd found from Royal Caribbean about their policies vis-a-vis, the Black Plague.

For those interested, that document can be found here under vaccination guidance.  However, here is the money paragraph.

To be considered up to date by all European countries we sail to, your vaccination must meet both of the following requirements.

You received your final dose in your original vaccine series (or a single dose of Johnson & Johnson) no more than 9 months (270 days) ago, or a booster dose. Guests that have received a booster dose will qualify regardless of the amount of time that has passed since receiving their booster. Children who have received one dose (unless Johnson & Johnson) do not count as fully vaccinated.

         Your most recent vaccine dose is on this list of EMA-approved vaccines:

            Pfizer, Moderna, Johnson & Johnson, AstraZeneca, Nuvaxovid

So, Mrs. J, being the intrepid Travel Agent (and a firm believer in the Galaxy Quest Motto) she is, went searching for places that might have one of those vaccines in stock.  

We finally found one in Boerne, Texas about 40 miles from Rancho J.  Boerne, used to be a small town like ours, but is now part of San Antonio for all intents and purposes.  Never the less, we went online and made an appointment.  Because of the encroachment of San Antonio, road construction in the vicinity is hideous.  The Walgreen's appointment info said arrive 15 minutes early, if you're late, your appointment is cancelled.  

Well, crap, we're running out of options here.  As we depart Rancho Juvat, Mrs. J calls MBD and relays the new info to her. MBD acknowledges the plan and begins execution thereof. I enter I-10 just under Mach 1 (Ok, the speed limit is 75, I might have been slightly over, but not TOO much) and we made the appointment with 5 minutes to spare.  

Then spent about 30 minutes getting paperwork up to speed.

Finally, the friendly pharmacist gives us both the jab and we're good to go.  As was MBD and SIL.

Blood pressure is down somewhat.  Further BP lowering events will be boarding the aircraft, clearing customs in Spain, and boarding the ship.  More to follow.

Oh yeah and most important, way to go, Mrs. J!  I hear they're casting for a Captain in Galaxy Quest 2.  You're a shoe-in!

Peace out y'all.  Don't let the bastiges get ya' down.