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Praetorium Honoris

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

The Old AF Sarge's Brain


While playing with my new phone, I was trying to find yet another way to conserve power. Other than stop surfing the web on my phone that is. Under power saving I found "Turn off haptic feedback."

For a moment I was extremely puzzled. For you see, I am an amateur historian. I saw the word "haptic" and my brain immediately went here - 


Franz Joseph I of Austria
8 August 1830 – 21 November 1916
That's right, the eye saw "haptic" the brain heard "Hapsburg". Emperor- Kings of Austria-Hungary and all that. (By the way Franz Joseph's full title was "Emperor of Austria; Apostolic King of Hungary; King of Bohemia; King of Croatia; King of Galicia and Lodomeria; Grand Duke of Cracow". Around the palace we just called him "The Boss".)

One other time, back in the day, overseas, one of my fellow airmen came to me in a place which served alcoholic beverages. Of which my comrades and I were partaking. He announced that just down the street he'd met an "English major".

I immediately asked "Which Regiment?" Followed by my buddy's very puzzled look.

"Uh, I'm talking about a girl, who speaks very good English because that's what she majored in at school..."


"Oh... Never mind..."

It's just the way I'm wired.

Go figure...

6 comments:

  1. I'm similarly wired.

    (digression) Speakin' o' English majors... TSMP has TWO post-graduate degrees in English and teaches same at yer alma mater (you DID go to ColoState, right?). You'd THINK someone with those sorta credentials could write the Queen's English with some sorta fluency, wouldn't you? But nooooo...

    I dearly love tweaking her on this. (/digression)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Indeed, Colorado State is where I received my Bachelor's Degree. Though I was married at the time... (Never mind.)

      More to your point, TWO post-graduate degrees in English. You'd think they WOULD be able to string a few words together and be somewhat coherent. But ya never know.

      Delete
  2. I had a roommate in college who was an English Major and an E-4.
    O/T he couldn't spell... or type.
    I helped him get A's while barely passing my classes.
    He was also smart enough to know he couldn't teach so he got a job as a tech write in Silicon Valley before it was Silicon Valley.
    Now he's got other folks proofreading and typing for him... and they're getting paid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. English Majors only impress me if:

      A) They're female and good looking OR

      B) They hold a Queen's commission in the Royal Army.

      Other than that? Meh.

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. Yes, the regimental commander always complained that the gentleman in question never...

      Oh, you meant the college degree?

      We professional types do tend to look askance at the liberal arts types don't we? Useless for getting a job, probably yes. But satisfying perhaps in other ways.

      Delete

Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)
Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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