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Praetorium Honoris

Friday, October 16, 2015

Random Musings, Thoughts, and Opinions

While deciding upon the title to affix to this post I realized that the so-called serial, or Oxford, comma bothered me. I'm not sure why it bothered me but it has been on my mind as of late.

Grammar is important, or so I've been told. Buck used to get on my case over the placement of punctuation marks within quotation marks. I tend to say things like "me and my buddies." I used to type that "me and my buddies". Which punctuation-wise is correct in the UK, but not in the US of A. I know I should say "my buddies and I," (nailed the punctuation that time!) but I tend to write like I speak. I guess I really am an illiterate and ill-spoken schlub. (I also make up words when I feel like it. Though I can't take credit for "schlub." It's an actual word. Sort of. I also like short, choppy sentences. From time to time.)

Anyhoo...

Those three sentences in the picture are good reasons to use the Oxford comma (which is the comma before the "and" in the title). To my knowledge Merle Haggard was never married to either Kris Kristofferson or Robert Duvall. Ayn Rand and the Creator never had any offspring (I think) and I'm pretty sure that Mr. Mandela was not an 800-year-old demigod nor a dildo collector. (Well, who knows about that last bit. Even if he was that's none of my business. Some people have odd collections.)

Grammar and I are not really friends, we don't hate each other but there are days when we're not really on speaking terms. While I fancy myself as something of a writer, I don't really use the language the way it was intended. Sometimes, after a particularly tough day, I leave the English language battered and bruised. But in those cases English would be quite justified in saying, "You should see the other guy!" There are days when English kicks my ass. (Figuratively speaking I am...)

New Topic...

Work is interesting. Sort of. When I returned to my place of employment after my medical adventures I was told, "We weren't expecting you back so soon!" Well, I was back so find me something entertaining, fulfilling and rewarding. Or just find me another project to work on.

While they (those mysterious beings behind everything) did find me another project, it wasn't funded just yet. So my old project was "directed" (asked?) to keep me around for another week. Or two. Or three...

So I try to make myself useful, play nice with others and share my toys with the other kids in the lab. Okay, so I don't have toys. Well, I do but Little Bit gave them to me for my 62nd birthday so I don't let others play with them. I'm selfish I guess, but they're mine, not yours, step away from my stuff and no one gets hurt...

I'm sure the punctuation in that last paragraph was horrid. Simply horrid. And what's worse, I don't care. I also seem to recall that starting a sentence with "and" is either forbidden or bad form. I forget which. But again... (Shouldn't start a sentence with "but" either. Now is that pronounced ee-thur or eye-thur? Perhaps either is correct...)

Yet Another New Topic...

I got a chuckle the other day when a local politician was all atwitter with glee at his perception of Shrillary "winning" the debate the other night. He figures she's back on top and soon the US of A will have its first female president. (Here is where I rush to the other room and become violently ill...)

I recall when there were those who wanted proof that President YouCanKeepYourInsurance was actually a citizen. I would want DNA evidence to show that Shrillary was actually human. Personally I think she's an evil cyborg sent from the future to kill Sara Connor.


Alrighty then...

One of the candidates for the Democratic nomination is a former governor of Little Rhody. He was also a Senator for a while. He was a mayor before that. One thing he's always had going for himself is that he's a complete loon. I mean he seems like a nice guy but then he starts talking. He truly is a block of granite. Well, not his whole body. If'n you catch my meaning.

Now Bernie Marx, er I mean Sanders, is a prime example of the type of socialist, semi-Commie WTF that is popular in my old home state's biggest city. It's also home to Vermont's largest university. That particular town has always had much more in common with the nether regions of New York state than it had with old Vermont. Heck, my goldfish understand more about economics than he does, and they're fish for crying out loud!

Well, that's all I've got for now. Maybe I should run for President. Then I could quit my day job.

Nah, the country isn't ready for an Old AF Sarge presidency.

Maybe in 2020.

14 comments:

  1. I'd vote for you against any of the Communists running. Heck, I'd vote for Sheba the syphilitic camel over any of the Communists running.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am more than happy to use the Oxford comma (when I remember).
    Also, I probably overuse commas (overcommatize?).
    I, too, have a tendency to write how I speak... hence, the words gonna, sorta, kinda, and some double contractions like shouldn't've appear.
    I have it on good authority, from a retired teacher, that alrightythen is a single word.
    And, sometimes, it's awkward not to end a sentence with a preposition.
    But... Buck was seldom wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I've always had a strong supicion that while John Chafee was off defending us all from Godless Communism his wife must have engaged in a dalliance with the village idiot. I had the pleasure of working with John and he was a very smart and capable leader. He was also one hell of a Marine. His troops loved him and would have followed him anywhere.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The apple fell an awful long way from the tree in Linc's case. His Dad was loved and respected. There is a very nice statue of him in Colt State Park by Narragansett Bay. Also a very nice ship named after him.

      I like your theory of how Linc came to be.

      Delete
  4. "I tend to write like I speak."
    Honestly, I prefer that writing style. Less snooty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Moi aussi...

      I really do throw the occasional French phrase into my everyday speech. Most annoying it can be!

      Not to mention a bit snooty.

      :)

      Delete
  5. I'd vote for you. You couldn't possibly be any worse than anyone else in the race. And while I recognize that's damning with faint praise, there are worse things than you making Yoda-esque speeches. :)

    ReplyDelete

Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)
Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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