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Praetorium Honoris

Friday, May 31, 2019

Didn't See That Coming!

(Source)
In the military, a skill one needs to have is the ability to wait. Patiently and quietly wait. Does it always work out that way? No, of course not. The troops love to bitch about things. Yes, I was a "troop" and yes, I loved to bitch about things. Everything, anything, you name it, I've probably bitched about it. I still do.

While traveling about the countryside, The Missus Herself is often driven to distraction by my running commentary on the habits of the other drivers on the road. Their lack of ability, their probable ancestry, and the obliviousness they demonstrate damn near every day.

But that's not really the point of today's story.

Another military thing is the need to periodically obtain a new ID card. (Yes, yes, I know civilians have them too, but usually that's really a driver's license, it has a two-fold purpose.) I don't remember the intervals on new IDs back when I was on active duty if one hadn't been promoted. (A promotion mandated a new ID with the new rank on it.) You also had to (typically) get one at each re-enlistment, something I did a number of times.

However, once one leaves the active duty ranks you get a different looking ID card, it's sort of bluish. When I was on active duty it was sort of greenish, now the damned things are used not only as ID, but also as a means to log onto a computer, and probably contains a DNA sample as well. It contains a computer chip too. It's white, and whereas the old IDs were oriented horizontally, the new ones are vertical in nature. Very fancy, very modern they are.

I received my first retired ID card (the blue one) shortly after I retired. As we were on a trip up to Maine, we decided to stop at the Portsmouth Navy Yard (it was on the way) to get me a new ID. Showed them my DD Form 214, gave them my last active duty ID, filled out a form or two, a picture was taken, and bingo, I had a retired ID. One thing the guy (active duty Navy) at the desk did that I thought was rather awesome was he cut the edge off of my old ID (rendering it obviously not valid) and gave it to me. As a souvenir of sorts. Rather decent of the chap I thought.

Now that ID was good for fifteen years (I think), not sure why it was fifteen, didn't ask. I was too busy enjoying being retired (though I was searching for a second career, Uncle Sam is generous but he ain't that generous with the retirement check). Not too long ago while The Missus Herself was getting her ID renewed, I had to show mine. The lady at the desk said my picture was too old and seeing as how I was there already, I should get a new one.

What the heck, let's do it. Thing is, the damned thing was only good for three years. That wasn't mentioned at the time and I didn't really check. Until a few weeks ago when the love of my life told me that her ID was due to expire at the end of April. Only then did I look at my second retired ID card and noticed that it had expired. A year ago.

Hhmm, that ain't good.

Long story short, I discovered that the system had changed since the last time I got a new ID, walk-ins, while not discouraged were not encouraged as well. This I discovered after going to the base to renew the ID. I was turned away, which was the first time ever.

I learned, I made an appointment online. When doing so, as there are hundreds of places to get military IDs, you have to enter a zip code so that the computer can tell where you are and you can select one of possibly several places to make an appointment. Oddly enough, while NS Newport was on the list, so was NS San Diego. Which last I checked was rather a long haul from Little Rhody. So yes, I picked NS Newport and set up an appointment for Your Humble Scribe and The Missus Herself.

Appointment day came around, the plan was for The Missus Herself to swing by my place of gainful employment to pick me up (NS Newport is not far from where I work) and we would get our new IDs.

Not so fast. Seems the ID office network went down, perhaps we'd like to reschedule, was the message on my phone (no cell phones allowed in the lab), meeting The Missus Herself in the parking lot she told me that they had just called and that the network was back up. Please hurry in!

We did and guess what?

Yup, network back down again.

Sigh...

Now what, we asked. We were given a special "go to the head of the line pass" good until Monday. So we endeavored to go in Thursday morning.

"Call first, to make sure the network is up."

I assured the nice lady that we would.

Thursday AM rolls around, phone calls are made, networks are certified as being "up" so we head to NS Newport. To find a mob of people all waiting for IDs.

Holy crap, we're in a tight spot!

We go to sign in, this guy told us "No more walk-ins" I waved the magic "go to the head of the line pass" and we were in. Still had to sign in and all that, but the lady we saw the day before spotted us and said that she'd take us as soon as she finished with the customer she was currently assisting.

It wasn't long, then we discovered that two forms of ID would be required, and the expired military IDs didn't count. I dunno, rules, terrorists, and what-have-you. But we had our "oh crap" moment right then and there. For we had no other form of ID save the driver's licences and the expired military IDs. Damn.

The nice lady behind the counter explained that she couldn't "wing it" as the computer, like some pagan god, demanded two forms of ID be scanned, and expiration dates be entered. We were seemingly screwed.

"Not to worry," the nice lady said, "I have an idea."

If I could just phone my town hall and ask them to fax our voter IDs (which I had no idea existed) to the ID office, she could use those. So, through the magic of the smart phone, I looked up the town hall number, made the call, explained my plight and was connected to the town clerk hisself.

"No problem, sir. I can fax those down in just a moment."

Which he did.

IDs issued, pagan god computer happy, Your Humble Scribe and The Missus Herself happy. All was well. Incidentally, when you hit 65 as a military retiree you get issued a "forever ID," no expiration date, good for the life of the holder. So I've got that going for me. (The Missus Herself still has to get a new one periodically, I guess that's if I go completely insane and divorce her. Never happen GI, I know what's best for me. As does she.)

But in one day, two people, working for gubmint for God's sake, going the extra mile to get the job done.

I didn't see that coming!

But thankful I am, kudos to the town clerk of my town and to the lovely lady at the ID office.

Bravo Zulu!



70 comments:

  1. Certainly not typical, but on occasion you will come across government workers that will go the extra mile to get things done, which is nice. Good to hear that your ID is now back in spec and you're once again an identifiable person.

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    1. Yes, I could feel myself fading from lack of proper ID.

      ;)

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    2. Well played Beans. Well played.

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    3. I've found over the decades that the best way to engender that helpful employee is to be the one customer they dealt with on a trying day who is kind, patient, has an excellent sense of humor and takes defeat gracefully because yeah, they do remember you and they do make time for you because most of the time frustrated people just unload on the poor employee for circumstances well outside their span of control. It has worked everywhere from airline ticket counters to yes, Pass&ID.

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  2. Good to see there are people under the "wheels of bureaucracy" face. Reminds me, have to renew the drivers license.......there's a wait.

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  3. Yep. I now have my "forever" retired ID and my wife checks her dependent ID expiration date from time to time.

    Pennsylvania is now going through the conversion of their driving license system to "Real ID" and there have been many speed bumps.

    We've learned over the years that the "two is one, one is none" saying also applies to whatever documents you are supposed to bring.
    My wife was getting something renewed, and before we went to see the public servant I asked her if we could review the paperwork demands.
    As a result of my intercession, she had a manila folder with her, and when she sat down and opened it up, the left side had a highlighted copy of the list of what she was supposed to bring, and the right side had all her documents clipped to the folder, and they were in the order that was on the list.
    And instead of the two proofs required, she had four. (This was the perfect situation to give my OCD full control.)
    My wife said that when she sat down and opened the folder the official leaned over and said, "Thank You" in a reverent, and hushed tone of voice.

    And how do you think you would have made out if you had not been cordial and cheerful to the clerk?

    Good post.




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    1. Wow, you guys are organized!

      I try very hard to be nice to people, it doesn't hurt and you can always bring down the lightning later if the person you're dealing with doesn't want to play nice.

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    2. There's a line by RFK in _Missiles_of_October_ -- "Once you nuke them, it's too late to try to be their friend"

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    3. Well yeah, I can see the logic in that.

      ;)

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    4. That was way beyond my usual level or organization, but I learned a whole bunch about organizing paperwork when I was an INS officer, and it has become a pet peeve.

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    5. I can see that, having gone with my wife through Immigration in Seattle long, long ago.

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    6. Thankfully Florida was one of the first states to go REAL-ID compliant, so I had to do the whole "order up copy of birth certificate" (which had to be a real certified copy, not just copied on a copier...) and marriage license (for the wife to show change of name) and bills showing we actually lived where we were and and and. And then made an appointment in a small town north of us because the wait lines in Gaines(socialisticcityfromhell)ville were too long and then made the 40 mile run up to get said real id for wife (why only wife, my (not)Real ID was still valid...) And then by the time it came around for my REAL-ID the lines had died down and it was a breeze.

      I hear that there are still states out there (all nutburger ones) that are not compliant. And the deadline for compliancy is getting close....

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    7. I count myself lucky to have a Federal ID. While RI is now compliant with REAL-ID, my current driver's license is not, The Missus Herself's is. My next issue will be, whenever that is.

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    8. I get your point. When I was named COMSEC Custodian the first time I relieved an outstanding RMCS who used to be a COMSEC inspector. He showed me how you organize, just like you did, for inspectors. Use the checklist, everything there, in perfect order and the inspection takes very little time. Otherwise they make your life hell. For those unaware, h. Veterans Health Identification Card issued by the U. S. Department of Veterans Affairs is listed as a REAL ID by TSA.https://ttr.sandia.gov/forms/acceptableformsofidentification.pdf

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    9. Now that's good to know. Thanks Cap'n.

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  4. Glad to hear it all worked out for you. In my experience, the gubmint workers in the south tend to be a bit more cordial than those in the northeast, but that's Probably generally true of most everyone - yes, that may be an unfair generalization, but stereotypes are there for a reason! And I can't imagine the view that clerks and DMV workers must get of their fellow man - there really are some stupid and ornery people out there (and those traits don't necessarily co-exist a there are some lovely people who are not so bright through no fault of their own, and also some smart folk who are real a**holes)

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    1. Well, truth be told I saw no faults in my fellow New Englanders until I got out into the world. We can be an awfully rude bunch up here.

      Midwesterners are friendly as can be and southerners have the best manners, and yes, stereotypes exist for a reason.

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    2. Being called "Hon" and "Sweetie" makes the wait seem better, so southern ladies rock in that respect. We have a few transplanted northerners at our local tag office and their curt, harse, no-nonsense attitude just sucks.

      Plus, being able to talk about the weather, the local sports team, fingernails (I find complimenting women on their nails smooths things quickly (well, as long as Mrs. Andrew isn't there...) and other minor conversations speeds things up, and Southern Women seem to excel at the minor side conversations while doing a completely different task.

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  5. My only ID card story involves a dependent's ID card (the brown one, or at least it was brown in my long ago youth). I was 17 and starting at college. I was lonely and unhappy and fell in with a questionable crowd (my roommates). After a Pat Benatar concert, we went to a liquor store where Frank's fake ID was rejected. I took the two bottles of gin and went to the counter. The dependent's ID was filled with a lot more fields and info than active duty ID cards, front and back. Also with a harder to read "computer" type font. The clerk looked at it, looked at the picture, looked at me, flipped the card back and forth, looked at it some more, then asked me, "What kind of ID is this?" I pointed out where it was issued by the military and that it was a Navy dependents ID card. Whereupon he proclaimed, "Well, if you're in the Navy, I guess you must be old enough." I was the hero of the moment amongst my 17-year old "friends", and even more more so when I revealed that I was still 17 and that it gave my birth date on the card, but seemingly hidden by all the other fields.

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    1. Dependent ID is still brown (I suppose the ladies might argue that it's beige, or tan, or something).

      Great story Larry!

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    2. Skip must do crossword puzzles, since 'ecru' is a favorite answer - so I've heard! :-)

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    3. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I had to look it up.

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  6. Interesting...But useful, since I haven't pulled out my retired Military ID since it was issued to me at Wright Pat on 6/29/2016. However, the expiration date is May 31 of 2020 immediately prior to my 65th BD. I'm wondering if I might have gotten Papal Dispensation for an extra year from the CBPO folks there. Mrs J's expires the end of September this year, but she turns 65 in October. I believe that while we were processing that information, She and the Clerk got into a discussion where it might have been mentioned that she had been a Personnel wienie during her career. Pays to have Friends/Acquaintences/Wives in high places.

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    1. 'Tis good to have someone along who knows the ins and outs of the system.

      Someone took care of you. Of course, all of my retired IDs have been issued by the Navy, maybe that's the difference.

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    2. Yeah, we're probably going to get hers done at Camp Mabry on one of our trips to Austin. We'll see how "ARRRMMMEEE Training, Sir!" affects the process.

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    3. That might be worth a post all its own!

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    4. Any trip to Austin is worth a post all on its own, just for the fun of reading juvat venting. And I think it's therapeutic for him, keeps his hair from going too grey or falling out or something.

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    5. I think his hair probably catches fire in that horrible place. I know mine does... You can see the gray ashes up there.... First it turns gray... then it turns loose....

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    6. Beans - Yup, I wasn't going to say that, but you did.

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    7. STxAR - I've never been to Austin, don't plan on ever going knowing what I know now.

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    8. It's really too bad what's happened to turn Austin into "Moscow on the Colorado", as juvat puts it. I have many fond memories as a kid visiting my uncle there - catching crawdads in the local creek near the UT Campus, going to Barton Springs pool, occasionally playing 'cowboys and Indians" or "Army" with the local kids. At one point, after I'd moved out of Dallas to the midwest, when people asked me if I'd move back to TX some day, I'd always say, "Yes, but Dallas has gotten too big. I'll probably go to Austin." But I stopped thinking that long ago - not only too big, but too weird and way too liberal.

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    9. Really nice places get ruined when idiots move there. They want to be in a place better than the one they're in, but try to turn the new place into the old place once they get there. I guess that's why I call them idiots.

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    10. Beans....WAAAYYYYY to late on the hair thing.

      Re: Austin. There's only a few good reasons to visit Moscow on the Colorado. MBD, SIL, My Niece, Her Hubby, and a Grand Niece and a Grand Nephew. Other than that, the WoodCraft store is about the only non-familial reason to visit and then only if they've got their wood on sale.

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    11. Um yeah, the hair thing. I too am follically-challenged. What's left is so white as to look blond from any distance.

      But think of the money I save on shampoo!

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    12. There's always nose hair, eyebrows and ear hair...

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    13. I keep my hair so short I just run the bar of soap over what's left.

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    14. Beans the 1st - Copious amounts.

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    15. Beans the 2nd - Been there, done that, Basic Training.

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    16. juvat, I figured you shopped at the one on 281 in SA. I'd have a good chance of seeing you if you did.... Course, I wouldn't recognize you unless you had your name on your shirt.

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  7. Don’t have a retiree ID to renew, but this year, and soon my drivers license is up for renewal.
    I’m guessing my age is some kind of flag for the DMV because I have to appear in person to take the written examination.
    I had to go in five years ago, too.
    I am thinking there is a potential post about the adventure, as MB gets to renew this year, too.

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    1. Yes, there are ages that seem to trigger mandatory personal appearances at the DMV.

      Not looking forward to that someday.

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    2. Fortunately, here in the Great State of Florida (well, until the donks take over..) we can, once we satisfy the REAL-ID Fairy, renew online. So far I've done it twice since REAL-IDing. We can do car tag renewals online, too, which is very nice. One of the good legacies of Gov. Scott.

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    3. Little Rhody does that as well.

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  8. Here in the Sunshine State (well, Volusia County, anyway), they have a mobile DMV. It is a large motorhome/bus affair with two full service DMV stations inside. It moves around the county on a schedule of some sort. Walk-ins welcome. Very nice. Took about fifteen minutes for the wife and I to get our California paperwork/cards, etc. transferred over to Florida certificates. They gave me my CA license, clipped, as a souvenir. I had had the same number since 1954. I do hear that a visit to the brick and mortar DMV here is typical. They don't have the reputation for nothing. It's hard to be efficient in a room full of anxious people and a giant analog clock on the back wall. I always wonder - have computers helped us or them?

    Your line, "holy crap, we're in a tight spot!", reminded me of "O Brother, Where Are Thou?" Ulysses Everett McGill (George Clooney) says that all of the time. Why yes, I like the movie.

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    1. Here in the Gunshine State we also have DMV offices at local tax collector offices, so you can go register to vote, pay your taxes, get id, get your car registered all in one place, rather than having to drive to get your car registered and then drive across the street or across town to get your id and then to another location to pay your taxes and then to....

      It has been nice having 4 Republican governors in a row(ish)(-ish because Jeb! was kinda floppy and Crist definitely had a horn growing out of his nose.) So we've had a lot of good administrative changes over the last 20 years.

      But, of course, a donk Agricultural Commissioner was elected. Why is this bad? Well, she controls the offices that control a lot of licensing and the office that controls Concealed Weapons Permits. It's a potential disater waiting to happen (and issues are already starting to show up by having a complete anti-gun leftwing environmental nutbag as our Ag Commissioner (Damn you Broward County, Damn you to HECK!!!)

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    2. Dave - You got the reference! (We're in a tight spot!)

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    3. Beans - All anti-gun leftwing environmental nutbags should be forced to relocate to Cuba (Venezuela would work, but I'm not a cruel man) or some other third world communist shitehole.

      Just a thought.

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    4. The rabid socialists and communists down in Broward, Dade, Orange and Alachua counties, as well as the cretins in Tallahassee all voted that mistake in. Hopefully that will be rectified under Gov. DeSantis' tenure.

      Actually, she needs to take an all-expenses-paid trip on Pinochet Airlines.

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    5. Re: all-expenses-paid trip on Pinochet Airlines

      Good one!

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    6. Takeoffs are real smooth. The landings are a bit abrupt, though.

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    7. And I got the PA off of the interwebs a while ago. Though I don't usually approve of Message T-Shirts (with me it's more like a Billboard T-Shirt) I really want to get one of these to wear around my socialist hell-hole.

      https://www.ownashirt.com/Pinochets-Helicopter-Rides-T-shirt-p69177.html

      And get a sticker and put it on the car of the ex-methlady who already has Bernie 2020 all over her apartment and car. See how long it lasts. (And, yes, I have thought of doing a night ops to put a Trump 2020 over her B2020...)

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    8. Beans the 1st - Humans can fly, we just suck at landing.

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    9. Beans the 2nd - Why not "All hail Marx and Lenin"? It's the same damn thing.

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    10. Not "All Hail Marx and Lenin," but maybe "It's hailing Marxists thanks to Pinochet Airlines."

      Okay, I'd buy that shirt

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  9. Good post. Everyone has said everything needed, including some mouthy pseudo-Frenchman... Does that guy ever shut up?

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  10. If you keep raising the bar like this, you are going to need rocket assist to clear it before long.


    "BeansMay 31, 2019 at 5:04 PM

    I had no IDer…" As there is no way I can equal that comment, let alone top it, I shall just tip my hat to him for making it.

    Thanks for the post.
    Paul L. Quandt

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  11. At age 65 retirees transition from TriCare Prime to TriCare for Life. AT which time it becomes necessary to pick up Medicare part "B" at the going rate. I was bumped from eligibility for care at the Newport Naval clinic and had to find a civilian doctor. TriCare for Life becomes the secondary payer with Medicare being first. Pharmacy benefits remain in force and inoculations (flu shots, Yellow Fever, Cholera, all that good stuff for overseas travel are still provided. There was a certain advantage being former senior enlisted dealing with newly commissioned Doctors. The senior staff, LCDR and above were never a problem. GMC(ret)

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    1. As I'm still working, I haven't made that jump to Medicare.

      I haven't used TriCare in years, my civilian coverage was better. As I approach retirement, again, I will need to start thinking about those kind of things.

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Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)
Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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