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Praetorium Honoris

Saturday, May 18, 2019

Hey Hooman!


 I am dreaming. I am in a strange cloud-world, everything is soft, yet somehow strange.

"Hooman! Wake up, the birds are singing! It will be daylight soon!"

An insistent voice echoes in my head, it wants something, what does it want?

"Is the hooman awake yet, sister? I am hungry. Well, I'm not really, but it has to be time to get up!"

With some hesitation I open one eye, the room is dimly lit, it isn't dawn yet, but I can hear birds singing. It cannot be time to get up, what is that in my face?

At that point I realize that I am staring at Sasha's butt. She has been trying to wake me up for a few minutes I gather. She usually will start by "talking" to me, various trills, meows, and the odd chatter that cats make when they're a bit frustrated. When she gets no response from all that, she tends to stick her butt in my face. As she did Friday morning.

Anya, Sasha's sister, is sitting by my feet, staring at me. When I look back at her, she stands up and meows in anticipation. Looking towards the window, I can see that it isn't daylight yet. What is up here?

As I am at an age where Nature calls much more frequently than I care for, I get up to answer that call. It isn't even 4:00 AM yet, why are the cats all worked up?

I go then I return to the bedroom. Sasha looks at me, then runs off downstairs, I guess that she feels her job is complete. I get back into bed, at which point Anya decides to sit on my back and nudge me with a paw.

"What?" I ask.

She meows, then returns to the foot of the bed. She goes back to sleep.

Later, just before six, I get up. Anya follows me downstairs, where Sasha is waiting. Their food dishes aren't quite empty, so why was I being harassed?

Well, they're cats. It's what they do. I have been around cats my entire life, will I ever truly understand them?

Nope.

But they are good company, even if they do like to get up too darned early.



34 comments:

  1. Heh, the only time I've heard "Hooman" is when a Ferengi has uttered it...... go figure. Now that open bedroom window season is here sometimes I can hear one of the neighbor's cats out in the distance after it's vocalizations have woken me up, light sleeper I am. Cats......cats are Machiavelli while dogs are Gilligan. I can tolerate cats but pups I LIKE. Until gene splicing happens one can't help liking what one likes. By the time Monday morning arrives two to four inches of rain is supposed to happen.

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    1. Heh, that's where I got it from too, a Ferengi.

      More rain? Seems to be a very wet year so far.

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  2. Most of my patients have either a kitty or a small pup. And they usually come to check out the new hooman who is here talking with their owner. Two days ago the lady I was seeing had 3 cats and a small dog who growled at me until 2 of the cats came and gave me a very through inspection. They sniffed me me all over, rubbed up against me, walked across my papers, ( I was sitting with my clipboard on my lap and my cellphone, which is my computer on top of that)then sat one behind me on the back of the couch, and the other on the arm of the couch. They tried to poke into my nursing bag, except I had it zipped. They stayed right there, nudging me occasionally for a pat the entire 2 hours I was there. The pup came over to say hi after the cats must have approved of me. He wanted to be patted as well. They all crowded around when I took her blood pressure. It's that hissing sound that they want to check out. Most animals are very, very protective of their hoomans when they are not feeling well.

    I get my pet therapy when I go see my hooman patients. But I do miss my kitty.

    Nylonn12: Keep that rain away from me...I am supposed to do garden stuff this weekend, and I can't if it is raining!!!

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    1. Cats and dogs have pretty good judgement when it comes to people.

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    2. Suz, on and off rain this morning AND windy AND temp is dropping.... down to 44F now. Watching the new neighbor dig a trench by shovel to lay construction block in...... aw.... youth.... he only has the weekends off from work. Hmmmmm...time for hot chocolate!

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    3. I won't mention how nice the weather is here today.

      Oops, I did, didn't I?

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    4. Grrrr........

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  3. On an unrelated note, I got my flight on “That’s All Brother” yesterday. So much history. Restoration is perfect, many photos were taken.

    http://ddaysquadron.org/d-day-squadron-launch-week/

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  4. My wife got a cat from one of the kids in our youth group. The girl named him Appleby... My wife leaned in close and asked, "what's your name?" He meowed, and my wife said, "Diego". After he curled up in my spot on the bed, and slept on my underwear (it was weird, how he crawling up in the chest of drawers)... I started breaking out in hives. No fun. Finally put 2 and 2 together after he ran off, and I quit getting hives... thank you, no.

    I have the same malady as the dad in Cheaper by the Dozen. Just about every animal that comes to visit winds up on my lap.

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    1. They like you. Too bad about the allergic reaction.

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    2. Cats can sense who is allergic to them. And then they mob that person. Seen it, lived it, got the allergy shots.

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  5. From Google:
    Some people say cats are naturally nocturnal animals (most active at night), others that they are crepuscular (most active at dawn or dusk). In either case housecats have a tendency to be awake when their owners are not, which can lead to conflict.

    This is why I like dogs, they adapt to their people's schedule...Cats do, however, have a special kind of charm. I think you just have to adjust to their schedule and all will be well in your world.

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    1. Dogs adapt better to humans, fortunately I am able to adjust to the cats.

      Not that they haven't compromised some, they wait until the birds wake up...

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    2. We had one cat who absolutely refused to even attempt to schedule her life around ours. So, well, we kept her up when we were up. All day. All day long, like 16 hours. She suddenly adjusted her schedule to ours.

      Of course, this was back in the day when Mrs. Andrew only needed 4 hours a day, and got up at 7am.

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    3. Cats can be, shall we say, stubborn?

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  6. Schmedly, our orange and white cat, has many similar characteristics. We've had to start closing the doggie door at night as she liked to exit through it and go hunting. Which is fine, except she tends to bring her trophies back to show to Mom. Some of whom are still alive. Not a good way to be woken up.

    Our Russian Blues, MouseKa and MooshKa, are much more like dogs. MooshKa sleeps at my feet. MouseKa sleeps on Mrs J's neck. Don't ask me how she sleeps at all, but seems to enjoy the warmth. Course this time of year she cranks the AC down before bedtime. Wonder why? But the two of them are very affectionate. They'll come sit in our lap and meow until they get a scritch.

    So....they're as welcome as the dogs. Yes, I'm still more a dog person.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, regarding the fur neck warmer, the big brained scientists are telling us the ideal sleeping temperature is around 64 degrees Fahrenheit, with around 72 being the warmest for successful sleep. So, well, anything to keep one's wife happy, right?

      As to your RBs, those are a neat breed. Very protective, and non-related males do not tolerate each other at all. Back when Mrs. Andrew and I were cat-showing, I saw one Russian Blue male removed from the judging ring. One man on each leg, one man with hand in mouth. The cat was screaming louder than the man having his hand removed bit by bit. 2 days later they were still finding blood drops. But cool cats, as long as you stay on their good side. Detente is important with them. And you must strike the perfect level of mutually assured destruction with them in order to have peace in the house. Are we still talking about Russian Blues or are we talking about Russians????

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    2. Juvat- Orange tabbies were favored by the Vikings, I read that somewhere. Russian Blues are a handsome breed.

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    3. Beans- There's a difference?

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    4. What the Vikings liked was Norsk Skau Kattes. I loved my Forest Cat.

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  7. I miss the gentleness of cats, the soft fur, the gentle purr and head butting, the 3 count alarm right next to my ear telling me to move quickly NOW!!! (hwurk, hwurrrk, HWURRRRKKKKK!!!!)

    Kegan's morning routine is to slowly slide crawl up the length of my body between Mrs. Andrew and I so that when the alarm goes off, he can shove his tongue under my CPAP mask and then bounce around the bed like a lunatic while we (Mrs. Andrew and I) attempt to remove Morpheus' deposits from our eyes and get upright before our bladders explode because some nuclear powered jumping machine that weighs 85lbs is trying to use said bladders as trampolines.

    Sometimes I'll wake up before the alarm and I'll feel his stub tail start beating against my leg as he starts spooling up his bounce engine. And I know I'm doomed to playfully being destroyed when I wake up to him making har-har-har-har noises and masticating me. Yay.

    I now understand the fascination of a chihuahua. Too small to really do serious damage in one bite, just the right size to achieve flight with an assisted cat shot off the bed (Kegan is more like trying to cat-shot a C-130.)

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    1. Kegan sounds like an affectionate dog. A BIG affectionate dog. I know a few like that. Love 'em.

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  8. Back in California around 2011, after nearly 18 years, our Emily passed on. A few weeks later, another cat wandered into our back yard. Disheveled, ribs showing, and starving, she put her front paws up on my daughter's thigh begging for food. We took her in and named her Zoey. Took her to the vet to get checked out. Already fixed, thankfully and age about 2 & 1/2.

    She is a calico. They are the redheads and thinkers of the cat world. Mid-length hair, white bib, white paws, white pom-pom at the tip of her tail. So, yeah--we adopted a teen-aged, female, redhead, feline. If she liked you, she really, really liked you. If not, fur covered skill saw. She has mellowed considerably since.

    If I lay my clean laundry out on my bed and don't get around to folding it soon, she will stretch out on it to make sure it doesn't escape. Only my laundry gets this honor.

    As is her want, outside my bedroom door this a.m. at 0630. "Feed me, hooman!" Late night last night, so I got up, put on my glasses, fed her, and went back to bed. Heavy weather inbound here. She is sure to camp out under my bed until it passes.

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    1. Furry friends give back WAAAAYYYY more than they take.

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    2. Forgot to add--

      Seen by my wife on teh web--

      Stated emphatically--"I do NOT snore. I purr, with the noise of 1000 kittens."

      Delete
  9. Reading your comments made me smile. Yup, love our cats ... all six of them! :)

    - Victor

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  10. Cats are very special. I love my dogs but there's something so enjoyable about sitting on our deck with Fuzzbutt asleep on my lap while I do nothing but watch the world go by and enjoy his company!

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    Replies
    1. I love my granddogs, but my furry daughters are very special.

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Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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