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Praetorium Honoris

Saturday, May 13, 2023

And on the 13, Beans reveals his True Self!

 Bwahahahahaaaa!  It's the Thirteenth, so it's the day of hiding.

No, I don't have Triskaidekaphobia, the 13th, the Ides of the month, is actually a historically bad day for the Beans family.  Car accidents, major health issues, trees falling on houses, just about everything short of Smashing Meteor of Death, and I still have many 13ths to live through, well, until SMOD hits, that is.

Instead of cataloguing all negative 13ths, I'll just relate some other things that Beans is going to have to reconcile with The Lord once the SMOD hits, or Ragnarok or The Fall of 'Murica or whatever life/world ending event happens (like, well, lungs filling up with fluid and that's enough of doom there...)

See, I can be a bit of an anal sphincter.  Shocked, right?  And I tend to kind of poke the badgers of society (no, not you, Scott the B) when they poke me.  Thus having to reconcile with The Lord once I suffle off this mortal coil.  Eh, it's the cross I bear.

For those who don't know, I live in a university town.  With the reputation of being The Berkeley of the South.  Yeah.  Didn't know that when I moved here many moons ago and didn't discover that until roots were well and truly planted, else mayhaps roots planted would have been in some more conservatively bented area.  What could have been, oh well.

Said town has a bit of a problem with non-Judaeo-Christian/Religions of the Book 'religions.'  Think things like Wicca and modern Druidism and other very untraditional beliefs.  Just like every place that is 'progressive' and 'liberal' (and I hate the debasement and redefinition of those two wonderful terms.)

Now, me being a modern person, I'm pretty tolerant to just about anything as long as it stays 10 feet away from me.  Organ meats, spiders, witchy-twitchy stuffs, fine.  Just don't invade my personal space with any of that.  Well, some spiders can get closer, but spider touch me I touch spider and spider don't want none of that if'n you know what I mean.  That pretty much goes for other weird stuff like all insects, rodents, snakes yada yada.  And unwashed hippy freaks, tweakers, ganja enthusiasts, druidic shamam, shamanistic druids and you get the idea.

What's my beef with non People of the Book?  Lack of tolerance, man.  They harsh my mellow bigly.  

Like in the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism, their motto is "The Middle Ages the way they should have been." No, seriously (eyes rolled hard.))  This means that Christianity exists along non-traditional religions.  Supposedly.  But over the years suppression of Christianity and Christian themes in the SCA have gotten worse and worse while non-traditional religions are allowed to express themselves heavily.

So me being a good boy and not wanting to push buttons, and to keep friendly with various SCA friends (or people in this benighted town,) I wouldn't actively express my rather conservative Christian values, much.  I'd express them as if I was playing a role, which I wasn't.  Just they took it that way.

Saying goodbye to people, I could get in trouble for saying "Go with God" or "May God follow you" or other actual medieval phrases.  Serious wailing and gnashing of teeth on their part.  Instead, I'd toss out "Via con Dios" or "Gott mitt Uns" or "Deus Vult."  And they'd smile and nod their pretty little vacant uneducated heads.  Meanwhile Mrs. Andrew would stare at me like I just committed a Mortal Sin and either give me a fist-to-shoulder nuggie or a Gibb's Slap to the back of the head once we have cleared enough space between us and them.

Seriously.  "Via con Dios" good, "Go with God" bad.  "Gott mitt Uns" good, "God is with Us" bad.  "Deus Vult" good, "God wills it" bad.

I even snuck in "Kyrie Eleison" a couple of times.  Literally "Lord have Mercy" and also the battle refrain of the Byzantine Empire.  Got a couple "Christie Eleison" in, that being, of course, "Crist have Mercy," but that got some side eye as it sounded a tad more Christian than 'Kyrie.'

Seriously.  Not kidding. Say it in a 'foreign tongue' and it's all good.  Say it in English and it's BadThinkTime.

Then there was the time in this town during the early days of war after 9-11, when a bunch of granola-crunching lack-of-deodorant-wearing leftists were protesting Bush II's illegal war, and were shouting slogans, you know, the same slogans leftists have been chanting since the Cold War.  I suggested maybe "Work will make you free" and they actually liked it.  And then I said, "It sounds better in the original German."  And nobody, except the cop I knew, got it.  And he called me the rude version of an anal sphincter.  

Yep. That's me.

So, late tonight, dealing with weather issues, so here's... Mr. Mister.  With their hit, "Kyrie Eleison."  No, not that.  And, yes, I had to explain to some witchy-twitchy types that the song they were dancing to was a CHRISTIAN SONG!  God help them, for they are beyond help themselves.  Or in Southern Grandma, "Bless their little hearts."


Oh, no, evil Christian music.

Here's the lyrics:

Kyrie eleison
Kyrie eleison
Kyrie elei

The wind blows hard against this mountainside
Across the sea into my soul
It reaches into where I cannot hide
Setting my feet upon the road

My heart is old, it holds my memories
My body burns a gem-like flame
Somewhere between the soul and soft machine
Is where I find myself again

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow?
Kyrie eleison on a highway in the night

When I was young, I thought of growing old
Of what my life would mean to me
Would I have followed down my chosen road
Or only wished what I could be?

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow?
Kyrie eleison on a highway in the night

Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow?
Kyrie eleison on a highway in the night

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel (Kyrie, will you follow?)
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night (yeah)
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow? (Will you follow?)
Kyrie eleison on a highway in the night

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow? (Will you follow?)
Kyrie eleison on a highway in the light

Kyrie eleison down the road that I must travel (Will you follow?)
Kyrie eleison through the darkness of the night
Kyrie eleison where I'm going, will you follow? (Will you follow?)

Songwriters: Richard James Page, John Ross Lang, Steven Park George.

This has always been one of my favorite songs, once I heard it.  Just a good song to sing when walking or driving or passing through various valleys of death and in the darkness of the night, if you know what I mean.

18 comments:

  1. This May the 13th is Fishing Opener here, Big Deal state-wide......... aaaannnd it's.....raining. Good song to post Beans and it helps illustrate how many idiots.er...fellow citizens really don't KNOW things. Deus Vult is my favorite.

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    Replies
    1. Oh, joy, rain while fishing. Bleh. I don't miss that.

      There's something about Deus Vult that really stirs my heart. The Church really screwed up by getting rid of all the Orders Militant.

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  2. Here's a couple of numbers from Otyken, a Siberian folk based group. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SU1apJTv94o and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXLoP9iSU5Y

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  3. That is a good song, and it brings back some good memories as it came out my senior year in high school.

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    1. Yep. Excellent song. Brings back memories.

      Delete
  4. God bless and protect you and yours, Beans!
    I'm old enough that I first heard Kyrie Elieson in the Easy Rider soundtrack.
    BG

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  5. It was a Monday the 13th on which I broke the blade of a forklift.

    Re the SCA. My wife and I were involved in it from the mid-70s to the early '90s. We dropped out because it was getting too big and too corporate. Among other things. Both of us spent most of our years as heralds, both book and field, which was fun. The West's Twenty-five Year Anniversary was the last major event we went to, then just gradually made our exit. Tried going back a few years later and didn't really recognize it. Told a couple of old friends, heralds, that we had "got religion" to gasps, then we said "Eastern Orthodox" and got, "well, that's not too weird."

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    1. Yeah. Too corporate is a good phrase. I last attended sometime in the 2010s and with my wife's health issues, it just became too impractical. And the assault on God didn't help. I have a friend who keeps us abreast and I really lost total respect for it when the BOD was going to fully banish a good guy because he had a Christian reign. Weird.

      I do miss the fighting. Nothing like a good long day of wearing myself out to reset me. Still dream about it. Sigh. I need to get rid of my armor one of these days... Double sigh.

      I don't miss the herald meetings, as I too was a book and field herald. But it got to the point that the heralds were just, well, that's where the ubernerds ended up, at least here in Trimaris. And there's nothing worse than missing fighting to sit in a room where everyone has to say the same thing over and over and over again. Though I do miss the commentary on devices. Don't miss the idiocy on devices or names. Had a friend with a Mongol persona, researched and submitted a name, got shot down after a year and told to consult a guy pretty much famous for all things Mongol. The guy? Her husband. Full double face palm there. Took her 5 years to get her name through, even with help from actual Mongols and her husband. Le triple Sigh.

      Still miss fighting... dammit.

      Delete
    2. While I enjoyed the fighting, it got to be too much standing around waiting. And the ever-changing armor standards, "Well, a minimum diameter tip comes in from this almost impossible angle, and it's high tide, the moon is in the Pleadiese, and the Dow Jones is falling, it might hit your eye."

      "Too corporate," aka, too much butt covering by the BoD, and in the 5 years before we left it just grew too fast. Not enough Olde Tymers to mentor the people coming im. Our first 10 years, if someone asked us if we had something, or knew where they could find it, we had no problem getting it for them, or directing them to our tent "Go in, on the left side, tan footlocker, it will be in the front right corner" and knew it would get back to us. We lashed up a tool rack, had pole arms, bows (Martin Archery ML-10s in 75#, 65#, and 55#), quivers with arrows, shovels, axes, etc. leaning or hanging from it. Everything always got cleaned and put back. Then we started hearing more and more stories of things going missing from others, and at courts PSAs to make sure someone was always at your site, or ask the people next to you to keep an eye on your gear.

      We both liked heralds meetings. At first we just drove down to Berkeley together as friends, chatting about ight subjects - religion, dead parents, politics, cooking, and gradually got to the point where getting married seemed a good idea. Her friends warned her about me, because in my mid-20s I was a typical guy, and "flirted outrageously (nudge nudge)" with several ladies. She was the chaste and pure maiden (well, recently divorced) who didn't drink, didn't flirt, tended her books and embroidery. I think what cemented our relationship was after a break in a very crowded Vesper Herald meeting, in which she was on a couch and I was sitting on the floor in front of her sort of between her legs, she took her seat, I came over to her and said, "Oh, spread 'em, baby" and a loud quiet flooded the room as everyone else silently gasped and waited for her to explode. We still giggle about that.

      Delete
  6. Wow, Gatortown sure has changed since I lived there four plus decades ago. Glad I was there then, not now. I have a low tolerance level for lefties of all kinds, especially those infesting academia and infecting yoots.
    JB

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    1. People don't believe me as to the politics here, but... "Don't Tase Me, Bro" was protesting John Kerry, for being too rightwing.

      There's a pizza place that gives you discounts if you're a registered democrat.

      I actually got in trouble at work for arguing with a happy-to-tell-everyone-I'm-a-card-carrying-communist college professor over self defense.

      We have 6 crystal shops but only one gun shop in the city, and they've been shrunk due to the Covidiocracy.

      Yeah. The turning point was the Reagan years. Sadly.

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  7. Beans,
    I'm not sure why, but somehow THIS seemed appropriate!
    juvat

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    1. Next time you're driving LBJ highway or whatever it is, heading in or near Austin, this is a good song to play.

      I have never suffered fools very well. Which has, curiously, gotten me in trouble way way too many times.

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    2. Beans,
      That was supposed to go to this URL.
      https://www.powerlineblog.com/ed-assets/2023/05/IMG_2929.jpg
      Don't know why the link didn't work. Maybe my HTML Kung Fu is fading.
      juvat

      Delete
    3. Makes much many more sense now. And, yes it does...

      Delete

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