Tuesday, April 17, 2018

Chant du Départ Safety Bulletin, 15APR18

New USAF Mandatory Food Preparation Gear
(Source)
ALL HANDS
171200Z APR
FM THE SARGE
TO THE CHANTERS
WD GRNC
BT
UNCLAS
MANDATORY SAFETY STANDDOWN IN EFFECT THIS DATE
ALL PERSONNEL WILL REPORT FOR BRIEFING AT TIME
INDICATED ALL SAFETY GEAR TO BE WORN INCLUDING
REFLECTIVE BELTS
BT
NNNN

In light of the Class D Mishap which occurred over the weekend at Rancho Juvat, in which the second-in-command of Rancho Juvat injured his throttle paw by grasping a hot pan handle (and NOT a hot panhandler, there's a difference) I have ordered a 24 hour safety standdown for Tuesday, the 17th of April 2018 here at The Chant.

During this standdown all personnel will review the relevant safety directives for their service (civilians to review the relevant OSHA safety directives) and to abstain from all hazardous activities. If there's anybody watching.

Safety standdown will commence at 1200 Zulu, 17 April and will continue until 1200 Zulu, 18 April.

In addition, Juvat will be required to requalify in Hot Pot Handling, Course 75-Bravo.

As Juvat was clad in his hard head hat and was wearing his standard Chant issued reflective gear (see next photo), no disciplinary action is required. (The pain of the burnt hand being considered punishment enough. Probably more than enough.)

Chant du Départ Engrenage Réfléchissant Obligatoire
(Source)
Juvat is hereby appointed Cooking Safety Officer (CSO) here at The Chant as an additional duty. I am confident that he will shine in that position.

THAT IS ALL






50 comments:

  1. Maintenance gripe: "Pan handle exceedingly hot" Maintainer response "Oven control checked. Oven reaches temperature set"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha! You know the drill Dave, excellent!

      Delete
  2. Oh! But, those gloves were excellent for bbq'ing.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh crap! Another Safety Stand Around. :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heh. You've obviously done this before.

      Delete
  4. yeah, yeah, yeah...build a thousand bridges....But as Cooking Safety Officer well.......Let's just say there's gonna be some changes round here! Bwaaahaaahaaa!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Or in other words...

      RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

      Delete
    2. But what about the people who don't like calamari?

      (Funny story, first time Mrs. Andrew saw calamari she stated that, "Those look like a$$holes pulled out by the roots." Very observant, Mrs. Andrew is.)

      Delete
    3. I will never eat calamari again without thinking of that. (Won't stop eating them though.)

      Well played Mrs. A!

      Delete
    4. She said it right as the eater was shoveling a handful into the eater's mouth, causing much flying of tentacles across the table.

      Her timing, as to be expected of a Mrs. Andrew, is always impeccable.

      Delete
  5. Oh, oh!
    OSHA.
    Around here that means CAL OSHA... $#|+feathers!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If OSHA is steel, CAL OSHA is titanium, or, maybe, uranium:plutonium.

      Delete
    2. Are Californians allowed to do anything?

      That is, if the State is watching.

      Delete
    3. Andrew - it's mined in Shangri-La.

      Delete
    4. By the Fugowees, a Native American tribe that got so lost they turned around at the end of the Bering land bridge and went west instead of east.

      Delete
  6. Y'all are just too funny. As I cannot compete, I surrender.

    Paul L. Quandt

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  7. I agree with Paul - LMAO !

    well played, Sarge, et al.!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ow! I sprained my finger scrolling down from the top of the page. You need to set out some cones or something!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh man...

      Were you wearing your steel-toed shoes, reflective belt, hard hat, and a note from OSHA saying you have completed mandatory scroll training?

      Delete
    2. I have a note from OSHA that my head is hard enough that I don't need an additional hat!

      Delete
    3. Close enough for government work!

      Delete
    4. You should always blog and social media with the proper Nomex gloves and sleeves. A heat-reflecting face-shield is recommended for normal posts, but required for political posts, especially 'flame wars,' and pron.

      If married, full armor is recommended for pron, along with the manatory 'Lawyer in a Box' for ensuing dissolution of said marriage...

      Delete
    5. We have that equipment on hand.

      Delete
    6. You have a 'Lawyer in a Box'? I'll come help you dump it in the local harbor...

      Delete
    7. Andrew Wetzel:

      Are you the Andrew who was commenting as Andrew or some other Andrew.

      Paul L. Quandt

      Delete
    8. Ok, I may have answered my own question; I went back several post and saw comments from both Andrew and Andrew Wetzel. So I'm thinking that we now have two Andrews providing comments.

      Paul

      Delete
    9. Well, screw you, Google. Yes, 'Andrew' is 'Andrew Wetzel' and the secret's out. Doomed. Now the government spies will find me and I am doomed, Dooomed, DOOOOOMED, I say.

      Piflesquitz.

      Frackin Google. Damned you, you overbearing corporate bloodsuckers.

      Must check preps, must check preps...

      And, dang it, that's my startling semi-good looks in the little picture icon thingymabob. Before my sex and race change (I am actually a female German Shepherd now! Woof, woof, woof!)

      Oh well, a while ago I posted here asking if anyone had ever worked with/for/near/knew about my father, the late retired LtCol Robert (Bob) P. Wetzel who was in the Air Force, started as F-84G pilot in Korea and then various AF projects dealing with tracking ships and testing and such stuff. Someplace for basic pilot, some place for advanced jet, Tegue (SK), Holloman, Kirkland, Vandenberg, AF Liason Officer at Kwajalein.

      Delete
    10. Well, let's try a test. See if I can defeet the ebil tech-giants. Let's try posting as just 'Andrew' again. Hmmmm. (ticky-ticky-clicky-clicky...)

      Delete
    11. Wow, it worked. Now I'm all secret-squirrel and under-the-radar again and Crap-in-a-Hat, Google, what the heck? You got my picture and full name down there thinking I won't take the half hour to futz with Capta, don't you. Well, Ill get you...

      Delete
    12. Okay, that's twice it works and twice it still wants me to be lazy and click on my pic.

      Ah, screw it. I'm used to seeing my (old, since I'm a dog now, woof) face and I AM lazy.

      Delete
    13. And all that was worth the price of admission!

      Delete
    14. Oh wait, admission is free.

      Never mind.

      Delete
    15. You know that it is not nice to mess with old people's minds ( what little they have left of them ). G-d will have harsh words for you. However, a sincere apology and a check with many zeros after the digit of your choice ( 1 through 9 ) sent to me will go a long way to making things better.

      Paul

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    16. You mean Andrew right? And if so, which Andrew?

      ;)

      Delete
  9. I recall a particular day in my youth during which the above mentioned safety gear would have been of some benefit. I was in college at the time (post Army hitch) and had packed all my gear and tools over to a friends house so we could cast some bullets. During the course of the day, one of my lead ingots got wet (which I knew). I set it aside, but then got distracted, and when the lead pot got low, sure enough in it went. The reaction is referred to as a steam explosion, and was instantaneous. It was over before I realized what had happened. It sounded like a short, muffled fart.

    Fortunately, I have worn glasses since the second grade. I was also deliberately wearing long sleeves and leather work gloves with gauntlets. There were several splotches of lead on my shirt and left sleeve, but the one that really got my attention was the one completely covering the right lens of my glasses. I got lucky that day. The only scar I still carry is on the inside of my left wrist where a small blob of molten metal went through the gap in the button cuff.

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    Replies
    1. I'd rather be lucky than good, which it sounds like you were that day.

      Delete
    2. RHT447 - Oh shit, oh dear! Or Holy Crap, as some might say.

      But all that reminds me of a story...

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    3. Juvat - I think we can all get behind that concept.

      Delete
  10. I have only 2 things to add. Father's Day is coming up...juvat should ask for new heavy duty potholder/oven mitts. I got my from Lehman's about 15 years ago...still going strong and get used ALL THE TIME!! We cook with cast iron.

    And #2: Never, Ever, NEVER leave a hand towel (the kind with fringe on it) over the oven handle, especially if you have a gas stove, and your broiler is on the bottom, and you are cooking chicken. Hot grease will slop out and up, fringe makes wonderful tinder and flames are 4 feet above the stove top tut suite. Fire extinguishers work well, but the mess is epic. Better than burning down the apartment though...don't ask how I know.

    If you do not have nice thick potholders, or have a brain lapse, immediate application of cold water is required to stop the burning process. For about 10 minutes, just let it run over the burn.

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    Replies
    1. Good advice Suz. I hereby appoint you as the official medical advisor to the Cooking Safety Officer.

      Delete

Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)