Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Surgery...

The Operation
Gaspare Traversi (1753)
So I paid a visit to a surgeon on Monday to chat about the situation vis à vis the diverticula resident in my lower intestine. 

The doc was hinting at the need to have this situation rectified surgically. (Did I really just type "rectified"?) While he was explaining the risks (minimal as I understand it) I was waving my hand in the air exclaiming, "Yes, yes, cut them out. Get rid of them, I am tired of these annual episodes which cost me time at work. Not to mention the pain."

"Yes, they can be painful..." the surgeon started to say.

"Didn't I say don't mention the pain?" Though he is not of this land originally, he's a pretty sharp guy. (Did I just type "sharp" while referring to a surgeon?) That is, he got the joke but only paused and moved on to the next topic.

Which were, his people will contact my people, er, me, they'll contact me, to inform us (again I meant me) of when the surgery will be. What to wear, when to get there and the nasty business preparation required for the surgery.

One might say that this will be an occasion when I'm not full of it. Shh! You know what I meant.

I'll be here all week, don't forget to tip your wait staff...

Oh, I'm sure the surgery will be nothing like that depicted above. For one thing, it's the wrong side of the abdomen and the doc swears they'll put me to sleep beforehand. He started to mention that a urologist would be stopping by to...

"I really don't need to know that Doc. Spare me the gory details and just knock me out and do your thing."

I wonder if they're gonna make me read tech manuals to put me to sleep. That usually works.

This is, by the way, a return gig. I've played this venue before. No outpatient stuff for me this time, they guarantee a five to nine day stay.

Oh wait, that's not necessarily a good thing, neh?

I shall keep you posted. Pun intended.

46 comments:

  1. The best of luck to you for a speedy recovery.

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  2. Good luck, may it be a complete success and may you have a quick recovery.

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  3. I dunno Sarge. do you really want to be known far and wide as a perfect a$$? What will that do for your reputation?

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    1. True, but if you have to be perfect at something...

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  4. Wishing you the best from afar. Get fixed and get well soon.

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  5. You're on our prayer list.

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    1. Is there a timeframe yet?

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    2. Not yet, should be soon though. I'm hoping within the next few days.

      Yes, you can drive and ring the bell while I'm laid up.

      Play nice with Tuna.

      Keep Virgil out of the Barbancourt...

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    3. The first two tasks are not a problem. The last one....Well, we shall see!

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  6. Good repairs are worth paying for. We will continue to look forward to further posts.

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    1. Indeed they are. Updates will be given as time allows.

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  7. 5-9 days! That is serious. Take care my friend and follow instructions.

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    1. Thanks Joe. I will listen to my doctor and the nurses. I promise.

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  8. Best wishes and prayers offered for a successful and uneventful procedure, OAFS. I'll look forward to your postings while under the influence of the pain meds. For the entertainment value that's in it, as Lex would say.

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    1. It could get interesting. Thanks Dust.

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  9. I had a Colon resection to remove a mysterious growth found during colonoscopy. Perfectly benign as it turned out. I was out of the hospital on Day two, and they had me up walking once I woke up. I expect you'll do as well! The two conditions for release were (1) Pass gas (really!), and (2) Have a bowel movement (to make sure that everything is connected properly) as well as move around.

    Despite my apprehensions, the hospital was quite nice, had good (!) food, and was filled with attractive young nurses who didn't make fun of me.

    May your stay be short and painless, and the procedure effective!

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    1. That sounds like the way to go. (And a very similar procedure.)

      Thanks Cap'n.

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  10. Sorry to hear that you are going to have the procedure done, but glad that once it is done your diverticula shall be gone! Very best wishes and looking forward to hearing how good you feel when you get out of the hospital.

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  11. Poppin and poopin, that's what most of us old guys are good at. Good luck, Sarge. It's got to be a little disconcerting to think about a guy with a knife attacking your fourth point of contact. I'll be pulling for you all the way.

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  12. Replies
    1. I'm just tired of having to deal with the diverticulitis every year.

      Sometimes bravery is a matter of necessity and/or circumstance.

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  13. May it all go swimmingly, as it were, and may your recovery be swift.

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  14. It seems like everyone else has said pretty much what needs saying.
    I will just add that you're in my mind with thoughts and prayers.

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  15. Still going to be sending up prayers for you, for a speedy recovery and also for your surgeon and crew that they will
    operating at their best! Kendy fought diverticulitis for about a 5 year period and she went through some terrible pain.
    She said it was almost as bad as kidney stones! Hang in there!!

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    1. Thanks Russ.

      The pain can be, well, painful. Hard to describe as I've never had kidney stones, knock on wood (he said tapping on his noggin).

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  16. Best of luck, of course, And I'll keep you in my prayers, of course.

    I remember when My Dad had heart surgery, he got videos and watched them beforehand. He said to me, "This is really fascinating! You should watch this one!" He put one on. Out of love for him, I watched about two minutes of it. I didn't want to see ANY of it. The two minutes I did see has made me fear heart surgery ever since. So, I'm with you. Any time I'm in need of cutting, just do the damn job and don't tell me a damn thing about it until you're done. Unless there's a major possibility of me waking up without some major body part I wasn't expecting to lose, ignorance is surgical bliss, as far as I'm concerned.

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    1. My oldest daughter always wants to talk about this kind of thing.

      I plug my ears and say "LA LA LA LA, can't hear you!"

      Needless to say, The Nuke is not amused.

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  17. I wish the best for you and your trials. I'll be having my own track investigated next month. Can't wait but then I don't remember anything of the first. When the doc said count backwards from 100, I don't think I got the second nine out of ninety-nine before I was out.

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    1. Heh. Been there, done that. When the doc said count backwards, I was out before I could formulate a smart ass remark. It was that quick!

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  18. This might be a good one to put on your e-reader. Help you while away the hours of boring horsepistol recovery.

    http://www.amazon.com/House-God-Samuel-Shem-ebook/dp/B00400NHRO/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1437509060&sr=1-1&keywords=the+house+of+god

    Uhh, might wanna wait until after the actual operation though. I'm just sayin. And I understand there have been a few advancements since 1975.

    Good luck. Thinkin and prayin.

    https://youtu.be/notKtAgfwDA

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  19. Take your notebook,so you can keep us up to speed on your recovery.

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  20. Thoughts and prayers for a quick recovery.

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  21. Still thinking of you Sarge, with only the very best thoughts.

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Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)