Wednesday, October 13, 2021

Destiny, Faith, and Other Deep Thoughts


Juvat has been a fairly good muse for me lately.  His posts of the last 2 weeks have really got me thinking about my own life, my kids, what I have, and what I'm grateful for.  On October 4th he wrote about Sergeant Erwin and the heroic action he took to save his crewmates. There's someone who could have easily died from what he did, serious phosphorus burns over much of his body, but he was meant for something greater and lived a long life afterwards. I like to think that we're all destined for something, but maybe only some of us are fortunate to find what that is.  The lucky ones live a life where that destiny is realized and put into action. It could be your life's work and occupation, or just meeting the love of your life.  I truly believe that my life has been very blessed and that it has God's hands all over everything, from my career to my family, even to my home, and I can see how I've been helped at each phase of my life.


Thanks to the encouragement of my father I worked hard in school and had my heart set on attending the Naval Academy.  My grades were good enough for three separate nominations: one Oregon Senator, my Congressional Rep, and a Vice Presidential nom thanks to my father's service.  But due to my less-than-perfect vision, I had to compete across the nation* for a waiver, as only 20% of each entering class is granted admission without perfect vision.  Because of that I was unable to secure an appointment.  I was crushed at the time and was aimless for a week or so.  Thanks to the local Navy recruiter's encouragement though, I had later applied for and received an NROTC scholarship to my mother's alma mater. That turned out to be a huge blessing as my calculus and physics grades there proved I probably would not have withstood the academic rigors of Annapolis.  USD or the Boat School- both of them make Ensigns.

Later in that post Juvat mentioned how he and his wife found each other. For me and my own partner, my wife of 28 years, I'm quite sure we were supposed to be together because of the circumstances of how it happened. First off, my brother, my sister, and my mother all knew her, but didn't know that each of them knew her as well.  My sister had taken a couple college classes with her and they had chatted often and were friendly.  My mother knew her from from church, where Mindi had been going to mass by herself after her parents fell away from the church.  And my brother John knew her because he was friends with her brother Shane, having gone to boot camp together.  He later married her cousin.  I was either away at college, or down in Pensacola for flight School, and had never had the opportunity to meet her.

Fortunately, one New Year's Eve while home on leave, my mother felt sick and could not attend a party that she had been going to for many years, one I had attended once or twice. She asked me to go in her place, but I balked, not wanting to go alone, and not having anyone that I'd want to take.  She asked if I might be willing to go on a blind date with someone she knew.  I found out later that she too was smitten from that night on.



Juvat's most recent post talked about some technology he installed that will help his daughter with his first grandchild, some high-tech baby monitors and automated devices to help comfort their child.  When it came to my children, both were premature (10wks/5wks), and as I commented to Juvat, I believe they had guardian angels on patrol over their beds from day one.  There's also a bit of divine intervention in how I got to my wife's bedside after she gave birth to my son when we were stationed in Japan.  It's a great story that happens to be my very first post here on the Chant.  It shows how I too was being looked after, with a lot of help from some wonderful people, and some cards that seem to have aligned with significant help from above.





When it was time to leave Japan I didn't get the specific San Diego job I wanted so I was strongly encouraged to head back to Pensacola and become a flight instructor for the student NFOs.  However, my wife and son spent over three months in the NICU, some of it alone since I went back to the ship after a time.  That was very tough and stressful on her, so I wanted her to be closer to family when we got back stateside- either my own extended family here in San Diego, or all of hers (and a few of mine) just up the coast in the PacNorwest.  It wasn't the best for my career, which I fully understood, but it did enable us to purchase the home we still own.  Had I gone down to be a flight instructor, there's no way we could have afforded to buy the next time I might have been stationed here- a city I knew I'd want to eventually retire in. So this was another blessing.  While house-hunting, I kind of think we were led here, because I had to make several wrong turns in order to wind up in front of the place, far off the course I was planning on taking and in a neighborhood I had no idea existed.  





I didn't have this same attitude earlier in life, believing of divine inspiration, blessings and such.  And my faith was weak at best.  Maybe it was a bit of arrogance on my part as I either didn't attribute much of what has happened in my life to God's hand, and I believed too much that my own smarts and self-discipline was all it took get me to where I was.  I do attribute some of it to a strong work ethic instilled by my father and growing up on some unimproved land in Oregon.  Between my 7th and 9th years on Earth we built our house, a log cabin kit-home you see above.  It was my job to carry water uphill from a creek to mix concrete, to get tools for my dad and grandfather, or to fetch nails or other building supplies.  Daily chores feeding a small cadre of animals, like goats, chickens, dogs and cats among others, was also a requirement.  And in the winter, chopping wood and keeping a fire going was another of my duties.  There was no complaining, not that I ever wanted to, but it would not have turned out well.  That was a different time though when parents were allowed to discipline their child without fear of CPS or a neighbor recording them.  I now know how blessed I was to have those experiences, as they helped shape me for later.  Throughout all this, with the deep faith of my mother, we always attended Sunday Mass.  And while I didn't necessarily pay attention all that much, it slowly instilled a sense of faith in me that strengthened after my son was born.  Seeing him in the NICU for several months causes one to make deals with God.  I don't think I promised him anything I wasn't willing to do otherwise, but I did learn to pray deeply.  They say it takes 30 days to form a habit.  What do you think 100 days does?  It'll definitely change your perspective, if not your life.  For me it did both.

I truly feel that I was destined to have my beautiful wife and our lovely home.  I also know God is the reason we have our kids.  That and my sense of faith helps keep me grounded and grateful for all I have.  I think it's an important quality to have, as it centers you, keeping you focused on your own life and not on things that aren't so great, or what other people have.  While I don't have too many problems in my life, it can be a challenge to not focus on the problems of the world.  I will continue to do so a little bit, with a pithy political post every now and then, but I also need to keep the faith and pray about it every once in a while.  It definitely can't hurt, and it might get some of that divine assistance that Juvat and I have received.





*There are by-state quotas for the service academies.  With respect to the Congressional nominations category, each Congressional Representative and Senator is allowed to have five persons charged to his or her quota at any given time for each of the academies. For each vacancy that occurs, the Member may nominate up to 10 candidates to be considered for an appointment.



 

19 comments:

  1. That was quite the first post there Tuna, really shows how many people can care and that there's a Plan for us even when we're unaware of it at the time. When the Big World events seem to be getting overwhelming I read from my dad's copy of " A Prayer Book for Soldiers and Sailors" given to him by his hometown rector and printed in 1941. Taped on the binding with well-worn covers, those words have provided comfort and solace over the years for me. Thanks for this post Tuna..........

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    1. You're welcome. I could say I'm lucky, but blessed is more appropriate. And sometimes those around us are the blessings.

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  2. Great post, Tuna. Sounds like we had similar adventures. Maybe that's a reason we get on so well. Thanks for the kind words also.

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    1. Of course. It took time to realize my blessings, but I'm probably more grateful because of that.

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  3. Nice. Heartfelt and sincere, one of your best posts Tuna.

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  4. Such a wonderful post Tuna. Thank you for sharing. If the truth were told, I think that is probably true of many more of us than tend to admit or think of it, if only we would consider things more deeply.

    There is a poem that runs "I got nothing I asked for, but everything that I hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am, among all men, most richly blessed."

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  5. I don't have any regrets, and I'm very happy with how things have turned out. Hopefully I would think the same if they hadn't turned out the same way.

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  6. One thing I found out years later about the service academies is that athletes don't count against any of those quotas, they are specifically recruited, with reduced admission standards sometimes. There are unlimited VP noms which is how they get in.

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    1. Ah, that sucks. Though I wonder how the athletes fair post-school-wise vs the normal admissions. I'm sure someone looked at that sometime.

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    2. Interesting. I knew some outstanding officers before the trade-offs began and also some utterly worthless ones from the same era. I found one could not, even after 24 years, say anything negative about any of their team mates. On the other hand, it wasn't them that destroyed the 08 and above ranks in the Navy. That was pure politics played with anvils and daggers in the dark at promotion boards. I sometimes dream that my life took another course but things I love would have been lost to any changes that might have left me happier at the time. I am content. The rough with the smooth. It is life.

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  7. Faith is funny in how it works on us individually. Some seem to just go along with the program, some glow with an inner light. You and yours seem to be more of the second, I can feel it in the background of what you write.

    As The Rolling Stones said/sung, you can't always get what you want, but if you try so hard, you get what you need. Weird that a rock group full of alcoholics and drug abusers were able to phrase the overall concept of Christianity.

    I like the MercyMe video. They are a very good group and they have very good songs.

    Glad you are who you are. Thanks for sharing your life with us.

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    1. Thanks beans, you're welcome. That happens to be my favorite rolling stone song. I've definitely gotten what I need, and then some.

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  8. Thanks for sharing a bit of your life with us, Tuna. It's too bad that we tend to not come to faith in the LORD until a little later in life. As we ignore all of HIS beckoning in our youthful lust for the "good life" we miss so much of what could have been. I ignored them all through college, then USAF. I found HIS gift of faith through a Naval Aviator - the co-pilot at Western Airlines. We flew together for a whole month. I was the engineer. (Checklist complete, sir!) We became fast friends and brothers.

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    1. Thanks Dave. There's definitely a difference between belief in God and faith in our Lord. I always believed, but truly believing that he loved me and wanted me to have his grace took a while. You Navy buddy sounds like a good friend to have.

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  9. Thanks, Tuna. It just got dusty in here.

    We all follow our own paths, whether easy or hard, and we eventually wind up where we are. I, too, was blessed from the get-go, and can honestly say that 90% of the troubles and "bad things" I've had in life were self-inflicted. Whether it was wine, women, or song, I was up for it, usually to my detriment.

    I'm not sure when my faith was renewed, but it started before we moved here, and now I feel it stornger every day.

    Thanks for the beautiful piece.

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  10. The NICU can be a tough place. The nurses have hearts of gold to work there. Much agony.

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  11. Thanks drjim and raven. The staff was wonderful, but the loneliness (Japanese hospital followed by a Navy NICU 1000 miles from home) was crushing. It's a happy and sad story, and it's even harder to tell. I can't repeat it without getting all choked up.

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  12. Yer a Good Man, Tuna, that is why you are Badger Approved.

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