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I had a very strange dream Sunday night, throughout the dream I felt disconnected from those around me, none of whom I knew, or perhaps I should say recognized. I had a feeling of being lost, without any prospect of being found again.
Buildings with staircases which led nowhere, strange neighborhoods where there were people, all of whom were decidedly unfriendly. I did have a companion, a very young lion who was becoming more and more uncontrollable. Not from a sense of being threatening but from a sense of wanting to be independent. (I was "controlling" the lion using a hand under his/her collar. During the dream I referred to the animal as a "mountain lion" but upon awakening realized that it might have actually been an African lion.)
Needless to say, when I woke up I was in a rather unpleasant state of mind. "What was that all about?" was foremost in my sleepy mind. Shaking my head, I went back to sleep. When I finally got up to get ready for work, I remembered the dream. It struck me that I had dreamed of one possible version of Hell.
So I did some reading, as always when dealing with religion, there are no ready answers. Certainly though there are nearly limitless interpretations of scripture, both Christian and other, not to mention the numerous translations of those scriptures.
So what made me interpret the dream as a vision of Hell in the first place? The feeling of being lost, lost in a profound and unredeemable way. If that isn't Hell, I don't know what is.
I did go to church Sunday morning, and I guess at least one thing the pastor said stuck with me. Much of the sermon had to do with "getting ready for Christmas," not the buying of presents and decorating the house kind of getting ready. Nope, not that at all.
The sermon covered John the Baptist and the first advent season. Preparing for the coming of the Christ and how we need to be ready for the second advent was the point of the sermon. Perhaps something deep inside of me feels like I'm no way ready for that second coming. Perhaps.
Lately I seem to be at odds with my professed religion. In many ways I have the feeling that the signal-to-noise ratio is so low¹ that I'm being distracted by all the various interpretations and missing the real message. Or perhaps I am not as receptive to the message as I should be. (And that "should be" part raises a number of issues in my head.)
Religion is, in many ways, a lot like politics, one of those things one does not discuss in the wardroom. At least as I recall those things which Lex mentioned shouldn't be discussed, what do I know, I was in the Air Force and a bloody low-life NCO to boot. But to my mind, anything which might set people on edge (or worse yet at each other's throats) is a topic to be avoided in polite company.
So I'm violating that principle here, but it was something on my mind and something I wanted to get off my chest. In many ways I'm "all at sea" lately, can't seem to get my bearings and have no sense of the current. (In both the literal and figurative sense of that word.)
I have opinions, I also have little patience with dogma, but I have a good feeling for right and wrong. I'm sometimes guilty of the latter, but try to stay with the former. Perhaps it was my pastor saying "There will be a lot of unhappy people come Judgement Day ..."
Probably true, but ...
I have doubts.
Far too many for me to be comfortable with, perhaps I'm overthinking things, I often do.
But the Bard had it right ...
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy." Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5
Anyhoo, that's all I've got for now.
Color me, out of sorts.
¹ A low signal-to-noise ratio indicates that the signal is almost indiscernible from the background noise. The higher the ratio, the better the signal.
"People Get Ready there's a train a'coming, don't need no ticket you just get a'board" Curtis Mayfield
ReplyDeleteWell ...
DeleteGod doesn't split hairs the way people and our brains do. Satan has a world wide system convincing you to doubt your self. I've followed your blog long enough to know that you have "it" dialed in enough to not worry about your "here after". But then, I'm just a Geezer, sinner with a lot of "hard knock" schooling, so, whudda I know?
ReplyDeleteTree Mike
I concur, I think you will undoubtedly enter the Kingdom of God.
DeleteBut you should have taken warning from C.S.Lewis, and let the lion go, as it " was not a tame lion ".
We're on the same wavelength.
DeleteScott - But the lion shall lie down with the lamb. (That was in the sermon as well.)
DeleteBut the lamb will not get much sleep.
Delete🤣
DeleteThere's always been political strife but since the turn of the century that strife morphed into savage, take no compromise warfare IMHO. Plus getting older has an effect like you stated, it seems like it has for me certainly. You provide a home to a cat so it seems like there might be a cat in that dream of yours....... :)
ReplyDeleteMakes sense. Strife has often been hand in glove with politics, witness the French Revolution.
DeleteI mis-read the title and thought you were going to move heaven and earth in payment of an obligation.
ReplyDeleteI see the subject is heaven and hell. Capitalization not a requirement in those words while in polite company to avoid throat cutting.
I should not be commenting while my coffee system still has so much blood in it. But comment I do. I believe I’m leaving these lines as an irritation for you. You’re leading a lion as a companion around an unfamiliar location and the lion is becoming increasingly irritated. You have it by the collar so there is control. Better than having it by the tail. That would have led you to needing to WAKE UP soon.
Franknbean
Having it by the tail would be a very bad thing.
Delete"The sermon covered John the Baptist and the first advent season. Preparing for the coming of the Christ and how we need to be ready for the second advent was the point of the sermon. "
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, to many Advent is diminished to buying an Advent calendar for the kids and an Advent wreath which is lit once a week and sits ignored on the dining table the rest of the week.
Orthodox Christians (mostly) observe the Nativity Fast, also called the Winter Lent, and many western denominations, especially Roman Catholics, have Advent. A time of reflection, prayer, almsgiving, and fasting. Preparing yourself to receive Christ into the world. In our society those things are pretty much anathema unless connected to some sort of eastern mysticism or the latest fad diet. One must at least partially immerse oneself into the spirit of the Fast to gain any benefit from it.
For a thumbnail of the Nativity Fast see: https://www.oca.org/questions/dailylife/why-fast-before-the-nativity
I don't fast. I get why some people do, I just don't.
DeleteI should also mention that I have HUGE issues with organized religion. Massive issues.
Remember: the Devil is a good salesman. He plants regrets and doubts in our minds to be an obstacle in our relationship with Jesus and our confidence in our salvation. Our sins He will remember no more.
ReplyDeleteYeah, he's a right prick that one.
DeleteSarge, in The Great Divorce, C.S. Lewis portrays Hell as a vast, shabby, dreary city where no-one gets along and everyone is separated from everyone else by streets and miles because everyone is selfish - in that sense, Hell has become the ultimate exhibition of "I, not Thou". So perhaps not as unlikely an adaptation as it first appears.
ReplyDeleteChristmas has become a very internationalized cultural holiday with much of the original reason for it stripped away - some consciously, some simply by adopting the outward aspects as happens with a great deal of cultural borrowing (and some amusing adaptations). The challenge I find every year - and more challenging it is - is the keeping of the actual reason, not the professed reason.
You are (by far) not the only one that has issues with your chosen denomination. Many I read do (with all of them, not just yours). The reasons are sometimes varied, but I suspect they have a lot to do with the Church becoming just another conduit for the culture, instead of a conduit for God into the world.
I am re-reading my Francis Shaeffer again (recommended if you have never read him). In his book The Great Evangelical Disaster he chronicles how the US denominational Church (Presbyterian in his case) went from solidly biblically in the early 20th Century to expelling a solidly biblical preacher by the mid-30's - in this case (the book was published in 1984) as a call to the then largely nascent but growing Evangelical church to avoid the same thing. He notes the two callings of the church, to be holy in its practice (in the sense of both doctrine and practice) and to love other people as God loves them. I find it noteworthy, at least to myself, that in reading this work from almost 40 years ago now, it seems that Schaeffer was strangely prophetic.
I need to read that book by Lewis, it looks interesting.
DeleteAs noted above the Devil finds ways to get at us, many times we don’t recognize it. The Lord also calls out to us, many times, if we would only hear and listen. For me, the traditional Roman Catholic Church opened my heart and my eyes, like a light being turned on. Right is right, wrong is wrong, Heaven and Hell are waiting, your choice to make. I found truth by reading the Bible, starting with the Gospels.
ReplyDeleteSouthern NH
I'll mention again my issues with organized religion. I have faith, but not in any church.
DeleteAnd then our current pope, the commiepope, upended a whole bunch of stuff. Hell doesn't exist? What?
DeleteAn excellent case in point!
DeleteIt is hard (or impossible) to understand the mind of God. The best prayers are "If it is Your Will" and "Thy Will be Done"...
DeleteWhich is the way things are going to go anyway, no matter what.
DeleteDreams are really a strange place for me. I don't remember my dreams unless they are quite disconcerting. Then I pop awake and have trouble leaving them behind.
ReplyDeleteIt must be troubling to you, else you wouldn't blog it. I'll try and be brief. I'm a protestant. I know Catholics and protestants use the same words but we mean different things, well, when you get into the the weeds of Theology. It helps me to see what the Bible really says, there is a reason the New Testament was written in common Greek. Can we really know if we are heaven bound? According to 1 John 5:3: "These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God." He wrote his stuff so you could KNOW. (1 John is a few books in front of the The Revelation). The Gospel of John is a good place to read about the "requirements". John 3 specifically details a conversation with a theologian about this. (Gospel of John is 4th book of the New Testament). God rewards those that diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6), so seek Him out. Get the two way conversation going (you pray and talk to Him, you read the Bible, He talks to you. I mean the Bible is His Word, right? Be aware of passages that stand out to you, that may be something He wants you to hear.)
We recently went through the parable of Lazrus and Rico the rich guy. If Rico is any indication, hell is no picnic. Wanting some one to put a tiny drop of water on your tongue because of the torture of fire is fearful. Therefore, I'd reckon, you see your world as increasingly unfamiliar, and the inhabitants unimpressed with your past experience or sacrifice. The people are possessed of ideas that are hostile and foreign to you. The landscape is changing, and your inner beast is growing increasingly irritated and at odds with the dissonance. You are controlling it, just. And that is a worrying place to be.
Unfortunately, we all see with our own experience and perspective. I remember when the current politician was installed, I spent three hard months drawing the hard lines in my mind: This far, and no farther. Could be, you are wrestling with similar thoughts. May God give you the "know", so your walk in the world will be with confidence and purpose. I'll be praying for clarity for you. That you will KNOW...
Call me a heretic, but I don't really think that the Bible is the literal Word of God. That being said, it is a valuable historical document, I'll also say that John gets it. His gospel sings to me, the others do not except in some small parts. I think we, as humans, tend to delude ourselves, then blame someone else (Satan?) for our foibles. There is much going on in my head these days which cannot be explained by a book written over two thousand years ago which was then interpreted and re-interpreted and explained to death in the succeeding centuries. I see too much of man in that scripture.
DeleteI can see your points, to a point. My Bible study quest has been the last forty years. Some college courses (maybe enough for a BA, if I'd declared a double major). I see scripture differently based on those studies. The whole organized religion thing is a sore spot with me as well. God meets us where we are. He does the heavy lifting. And there is very little on or under the earth as heavy as a heart can be. I'm still praying for clarity for you. Of all the things I really like or need, clarity is what I crave.
DeleteHe does do the heavy lifting, that's for sure.
DeleteYeah, I get it, I "Left" my native religion (Presbyterian) many years ago as it was turning itself into a liberal social welfare organization. As nearly as I can tell, there is no trendy BS which will not be immediately and unthinkingly adopted by them. The phrase "Gaderene swine" keeps popping into my head.
ReplyDeleteToo many denominations are doing that these days.
DeleteThat is why I have not been in a Lutheran Church for years. They left me, I didn't leave them.
DeleteToo true for so many.
DeleteSame with me and the RCC. I'm more RCC than the RCC.
DeleteMany feel the same.
Deletelooking at things with quite a different eye (my usual), I sorta got the impression that the wanderer was Jesus who had come back to the the United States today wondering what had become of His people, how badly they had strayed; the "uncontrollable" young lion (who is in reality protecting Him) is, of course, you.
ReplyDeleteGood thing my Hebrew name is Moses, not Daniel.
Certainly a different way of looking at it, it has some validity.
Deletenot Daniel - sorry, meant Joseph interpreting the 7 fat and the seven lean kine - getting old and the hard disk skips around a bit
DeleteI get that, I have similar issues with memory!
DeleteAh, dreams. Aren't they fun? I always love the way, 3-5 days down the line, memories of past dreams come flooding in and strange things happen.
ReplyDeleteAs to Heaven and Hell, I hope the first exists and I manage to make it, but... (looks at the litany of Catholic Guilt items stored in the memory files...)
Too many priests, especially influential ones, in most all religions, seem to have fallen or be working for the Morningstar. Jesus was a tranny because he has a gaping bleeding wound in his side from Longinius' spear? WTheck? Hell doesn't exist? (commie pope) God doesn't exist? (church of England)
Sometimes the siren call of Shintoism is heard, makes more sense than a lot of Christianity these days, though I can see a combination of Olde Schoole Christianity and Shintoism working, acknowledging the spirits of the land and things at the same time the Word of God. Sure I'm gonna burn at the stake for that one.
Then there's the "Don't get noticed" school of Christianity, of which I am a deacon. To wit, do good enough to better the world. Big things get one noticed by either or both sides and great unhappiness ensues. Seriously, read the Bible as a cautionary tale of what happens when the Big Guy or the Bad Guy has you on their radar. Or read about the various lives of saints and Christian mystics. Get noticed, bad things. See the Virgin Mary and you'll suffer horrible pains for the rest of your life. Angel asks you to do something and historical records show great personal misery will ensue even if you succeed. The tallest nail gets pounded first type of thing. Bear the Christ-Child and you get to see him mistreated and murdered and then have to dodge everyone for the rest of your life.
These are the thoughts that roll around in my head all the time. Questioning my existence way too much.
Bleh. Heady heavy thougths.
Time to listen to some good old Christmas carols and Christmas songs. I'ma gonna see what Puddles has done with Christmas songs, since he takes nominally happy songs and dirges them, mayhaps he de-durges durges and turns them into happy songs...
Oh Lord, not Puddles! (Runs off chuckling madly ...)
DeleteProhibited topics in a wardroom were sex, religion and politics.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I believe that when the power goes out to our CPUs, that’s all she wrote. The good or the evil that we do will live on in the memories of those whose lives we affected.
Ah yes, sex was the other one!
DeleteAs to the power going out, and being all she wrote, a possibility, for sure. But your last statement, that right there is gold.
"I have HUGE issues with organized religion." I hear you. Lots of people do. As the old Nego spiritual said, "Everybody talkin' 'bout heaven ain't goin' there!" I'm currently reading the first of a series of books written by John Piper, the first on the trustworthiness of the Bible, called "A Peculiar Glory". Not a "beat you over the head with it" sort of presentation, but, I've learned a lot already and I'm only about 65 pages in!
ReplyDeleteI'd tell you what I've been dreaming about, but then, you might swear off sleeping!
I might have to seek that book. Knowledge helps.
Delete