Other than a Court Martial I sat on while at Holloman, I haven't sat on a jury. I wasn't thrilled, but I would show up and do my part. I glanced at the date 10/17 and made the requisite notation in my portable electronic brain for 8:30 on the 17th.
Showed up at the district court promptly at 8:30 and had no trouble finding parking. Didn't seem like much activity, so I flagged down somebody who looked officious and asked where everybody was.
Puzzled he was. I showed him the summons. He showed me the date. 10/10/17.
"Awwwww.........Nuts!" Or something along those lines.
He directed me to the District Clerk's office where I professed my stupidity and was let off with a warning not to do this again. "No, Ma'am".
Well, I did it again, but this time with a higher power. Somehow I got myself convinced that this past Saturday was the 27th. October 27th is an important date, maybe THE most important date in the history of my universe.
My Wife's Birthday.
So, we're at lunch last Friday, and she's giving me this funny look.
"What?"
"What's today's date?"
"26th, why?"
"Might want to check that."
"Awwwww.........Nuts!" Or something along those lines.
After I prostrated my self before her august throne, begging forgiveness, she relented. I had been planning dinner with the Most Beautiful Daughter and her boyfriend for Saturday and had miscounted days when planning.
Or maybe it's Altzheimer's. Who knows?.
But...My Sister was working Saturday, and the Daughter-in-Law went to watch the Aggies play in College Station (Rats...Ignominious defeat), so were unable to attend.
Which means we're celebrating again on Sunday, so they can bring their swag to present. I am relegated to Chief Cook and Bottle Washer.
So...."Honey, what would you like for Birthday Dinner on Sunday?"
"I don't know, surprise me."
So...If I'm never heard from again...You'll know what happened.
 |
| My version! |
*Gomer Pyle
So yeah, that came out perfect.
ReplyDeleteNow back to waiting for my roofer. Big storm last night. Big leak. I was playing U-Boat captain at 0300 or so.
That is no fun. I remember during the hurricane attacks of 2004 fixing a leak in the roof long enough to last until the season was over, then having to wait until someone was available to get the roof done.
DeleteHope things stay dry from now on.
Well, October's almost over. Here's something to keep it in perspective
ReplyDeleteGlad to see you're still alive to post! Happy belated b-day to Mrs. Juvat.
ReplyDeleteReally wasn't much worry involved. She loves all things Halloween.
DeleteDo not be afraid to use your "Old Man Card", simply look confused and dazed, say "What" a lot and then apologize. I use this a lot and it always works.
ReplyDelete"...look confused and dazed", I mastered that look years ago.
DeleteI once was summoned, and had to sit through all day selections (I think 5 was the magic number) while I was working at the local PD, in the Forensic Unit (as a staff assistant, but I kept all the records and saw all the gory details.) Everyone who I was 'sitting' for was someone I had way too much knowledge for. The judge and lawyers knew this from the beginning but still didn't let me off.
ReplyDeleteNow that I am free as a bird, so to speak, no jury notices.
My handicapped wife, who suffers from narcolepsy, gets popped about every 6 months. We have actually gone in a few times when they wouldn't recuse her right away, and for some strange reason being in a wheelchair and having a service dog gets you sent home right quickly.
Now, I do, really do, want to sit on a jury. The local lawyers would never ever select me.
As to your wife situation, well, "Dude, you're screwed." Forgetting in the first few years is expected, after that, not so much. Glad she has a sense of humor.
I was fairly certain I would be excused, but it would have been interesting. (And Sarge and I could compare notes)
DeleteYep, enjoy the doghouse... Hope you got the addition built onto it! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI had Sarge's builder do it. It leaks!
Delete🤣🤣🤣
Delete