Sunday, January 8, 2017

What Was That About Winter?


So Friday we had a bit of snow, 3 to 4 inches I believe it was, Saturday on the other hand...

Started later than Friday. I knew we were in for a possible snowstorm, 4 to 8 inches was the first indication I got. Then it happened, The Missus Herself realized we were short one jar of this...

(Source)
So I was "voluntold" off to the local grocery emporium. Now the weather hadn't turned really bad, yet. But the snow was falling a bit faster, and oh my goodness, gosh golly, was it ever cold. In the twenties I reckoned, a bit o' wind thrown in and it was unpleasant outside.

When I got to the local grocery emporium, the parking lot was full. I mean jam-packed with lots and lots of ee-jits trying to park right next to the store. Yeah, right. I just headed to the outer limits of the lot, found a spot and headed in to grab my jar of Prego. I knew that the jar I sought was, "in there."



Anyhoo, when I got inside the store, I was confronted with a scene much like the following...

(Source)
Okay, it was indoors, much better lit, and everyone was wearing modern clothing. But, nevertheless, it was disorganized, messy, and unpleasant. So I fought my way inside, found my Prego (yes! it's in there!) and fought my way back to the front of the store. While one could sense that there were lines forming at the registers, it was tough to tell which line went where.

Immediately I hustled out to the right flank of the mob and attached myself to a line for one of the self-service lanes.

Of course, there were Jim-Bob and Billie-Sue doing their weekly shopping (oblivious to the impending snow-pocalypse or simply oblivious, I wasn't sure) and of course they are in the self-serve line with a cart heaped full of groceries and of course they are as familiar with the self-service concept as Melanesian tribesmen were with aerial re-supply. I guess if they waved the item they wished to purchase at the scanner with enough vigor, eventually enough of the bar code would be read to register a price. Then they could pick up another item and begin waving it at the scanner.

And of course, one had the job of bagging their booty while the other scanned. I surmised that they had devised this division of labor by determining who was the least fit for the chosen task. Yup, the one scanning had no clue, the one bagging, if at all possible, was even worse. ("Yes," I mumbled to myself, "the bag must indeed be open before attempting to insert an item.") Groan, I was sure that I would be stuck in that store for all of eternity.

Eventually a store employee took pity on a few of us and opened another register, sort of. Number One register was down for maintenance, but at the end of that area was another register which could be used for price checks and normal store-employee type stuff. (Which did not involve waving items in the air and grunting until the bar-code-gods took pity and registered the price.)

This lady grabbed a few of us who had three items or less and shepherded us to that lonely register. I could tell that the other shoppers in the vicinity were somewhat aghast at this "special treatment" those of us who were actually just buying a few things (rather than doing the monthly underway replenishment in the face of a major snowstorm) were receiving . So I quickly began throwing small branches at the other shoppers, making mock charges and thumping my chest.



Yeah, something like that. But it had the desired effect. (Maybe I just grimaced at them with my best, "Hey, I might be a psychopath" look.)

Anyhoo, I got my sauce, decided to grab an ice coffee at Dunkin Donuts before returning to Chez Sarge for to watch the snow. Discovered that the roads were getting pretty slick. The really cold snow was rather greasy from all the traffic.

Got my coffee, headed home and spent the remainder of the day relaxing. Watching the storm.





A messy day, Sasha had the right idea.


Cats know how to relax.

As I write this the forecast calls for up to 12 inches of the white stuff. Looks like I'll be sleeping in this Sunday morning!





30 comments:

  1. Iced Coffee--->20 degrees, Windy, Snowing, Icy Roads. Sarge, this'll be the second time this week I've used this term, you are HARD CORE!

    It's a nippy, but calm 18 down here. Supposed to get up to 40 today. Probably have to crush some more ice for the Horse's cocktail hour this morning, but tomorrow is forecast to be much more pleasant. Hopefully, your's is also.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They're predicting temps to "soar" into the forties later this week. Plus rain. While it's true that you don't have to shovel rain, it ain't very picturesque.

      I had a fellow at work ask me why I drank iced coffee in the winter. I asked him if he warmed his beer up in the winter. "No, of course not!" Did he stop drinking beer in winter? "Well, no, of course... Ah, I get it."

      If I want to be warm I dress in layers or I stay inside. I will drink hot coffee on the weekends. One in the morning. The rest of the time, it's gotta be iced.

      Delete
    2. I'm a big fan of Iced Coffee, Spring Break to Thanksgiving. Too hot outside. The rest of the year, it's hot coffee. It may just be to warm my hands though.

      Course, the one advantage of Iced Coffee in the Winter, especially where the Winter is regularly cold, is that the Coffee stays cold. So, like Bill Murray, you've got that going for you.

      Delete
  2. Have a nice winter's nap, Chris. DO NOT, NOT I SAY, hurt yourself moving that white stuff; find some waif, wave cash at him ( or her, must not be sexist, ya know ), and sit back to watch as the job is done.

    Paul L. Quandt

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There's a brawny young lad next door who has offered to keep the driveway clean this year.

      I only move snow these days if it's on my car. Otherwise I pay someone, or just drive through it. Both work for me.

      :)

      Delete
  3. Gotta ask did you really need the jar of Prego????

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If mama ain't happy, no one is happy.

      Delete
    2. @Any Mouse - absolutely, the wife was making one of her specialties for the grand kids, of course, I get to eat too!

      Delete
  4. The "danged" snow is gone from here.
    It was pretty while it lasted.
    There's a really wet Pacific system now hosing us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I saw that system on the weather. Looks nasty for some parts of the state!

      Delete
  5. Lemme just echo Juvat. Can you imagine what would happen if you spilled that iced coffee in your lap in those conditions? The phrase "brass monkey" comes to mind...

    Stay warm and enjoy watching nature's majesty. It's out there.

    It was minus 4 here when I went to bed last night, and plus 34 when I woke up! I love these little mid-winter gifts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Spill iced coffee? Why that's abuse! And heresy!

      Besides which, spilling hot coffee is worse. DAMHIK.

      Minus 4 to plus 34, I always get a kick out of those big swings in temperature, when they're going up that is!

      Delete
  6. -8 when I got home this AM. Made myself a right proper supper from leftovers, roast beast, mashed potatoes, and gravy, washed down with Canada Dry Ginger Ale. And now, to bed!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Minus 8? Any wind?

      Sounds like a right hearty meal!

      Delete
    2. Nope, still. But tonight, when I left The Burrow to go to work, it was +15, with 30 MPH winds, so, it seems I am not allowed to win.

      Delete
    3. I'll take -8 with no wind over +15 with 30MPH any day of the week.

      That winter wind goes right through me!

      Delete
    4. It's what they call in Yorkshire a "Lazy Wind", it can't be bothered to blow around you, so it blows right through.

      Delete
  7. I think about the total snow accumulation y'all get, and then I remember four years ago when our winter total was 169". But we have huge snowplows, and brine trucks, and cinder spreaders, and everyone runs studded winter tires (or the new studless variety) for six months out of the year. Knowing how to cope with the snow, and having the right equipment for it, makes us feel sorry for folks that have none. Stay safe down there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sigh. People who don't know how to drive in snow...

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  8. At least you don't have to remember to bring in your own grocery bags

    ReplyDelete
  9. Nope Nope Nope Nope Nope. Too cold for me. Running snow tires on your car? Family in Oregon are posting very similar pics, but the whole county might own a single snowplow.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Said the Sandy Eggo man...

      (Believe me, I understand.)

      Delete
  10. Yeah, It's in the 50's here. I had to break out the lined windbreaker.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. In the 50s?!?! OMG, have you had to turn on your heat? Do homes in Sandy Eggo even have heat?

      Delete

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Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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