Thursday, July 22, 2021

D'Oh!


Wednesday morning, 0515 PDT, Your Humble Scribe is performing his morning ablutions prior to heading down to the pier for to perform his duties aboard one of America's newest warships. When I noticed something...

Yeah, kinda like this, only the sun wasn't up yet...
(Source)

After a Saturday night of damned near no sleep, two flights which took me from PVD to SAN. An 11 hour day followed by a "why am I awake at 0300?" Followed by another day of the same, I actually had a normal night's sleep. (When you're a 68 year old male that means you get up every cuppla hours to pee. Yeah, yeah, TMI but this is a full, up front, in your face kinda blog. Sorta.)

Whilst in the midst of showering I had the thought that my shampoo was rather weak, no substance to it at all. Almost like conditioner rather than...

Damn it!

Whilst purchasing various and sundry items to make my trip more pleasant (not a huge fan of hotel soaps and the like) I bought what I thought was a shampoo/conditioner combo.

The picture above shows what I actually purchased.

(Source)

Yup, that's me...

(Source)

Guilty as charged.




38 comments:

  1. HA HA HA......(breathing) heh heh heh...........:)

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  2. Oh the other hand, a naturally thick mane of slightly wavy mostly grey/white hair isn't all that it's cracked up to be.
    Our water bills and hair care product costs are higher, hat hair is a real concern, and sometimes it takes a very long time to get that one curl of white hair above my forehead to sit just so.

    "Gimme a head with hair
    Long, beautiful hair
    Shining, gleaming
    Streaming, flaxen, waxen...."

    :)







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  3. I used to use that very conditioner (and shampoo, as well)... Until I was informed by my allergist (after some uncomfortable testing) that I was, in fact, allergic to it and it was CAUSING the dandruff I was using it to prevent...

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  4. How funny - of course, I've NEVER done that before, no sir, not even once...or twice...or ....
    And while I sympathize with the condition of sleep interrupted for dealing with renal output, please be careful when using the phrases "having to get up to pee" and "in your face.." in such close proximity!

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  5. Sarge, when I traveled to Japan in 2020 to train I realized I had forgotten my tooth brush. No big deal, right? After all, Japan is a first world country and there are stores everywhere.

    Except when your training starts at 0500 and you have maybe an hour in the afternoon to get out and the stores are at least 30 minutes away.

    Knowing we were going to Tokyo in a week, I persevered by brushing my teeth with my fingers and toothpaste until we left. And flossed.

    I am taking two next time. Just in case.

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    Replies
    1. We now know what toothbrushes cost in Germany because of the exact same packing reason.

      With the near perfect hindsight of time and distance from the problem, I wonder if you could have broken a piece from a disposable wooden chopstick, soaked it and frazzled the end, and made a makeshift tooth cleaning tool?

      Based on input from our tooth doctors, we now also travel with a portable pressure washer made for teeth. The device also does a great job of jewelry cleaning, and also does well to clean those yucky deposits that build up on my eye glass swivel pads.

      I've not yet been tempted to machine an adapter so that we can use the gasoline powered pressure washer as a water pick.

      On a related topic, I just found out that there is a gizmo that converts the gasoline pressure washer to a water jet drain cleaner.
      What could possibly go wrong with using more than 3000 pounds of water pressure to clear a clogged sink or toilet drain!





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    2. John,
      Haven't you been woken? Gasoline powered things are verboten in the brave new world!!! Except to recharge electric vehicles of course.

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    3. But... but... Japan sells everything, I mean EVERYTHING, from vending machines. Cars, beer, food, toiletries, used underwear...

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    4. juvat,
      The battery start feature is partially woke. :)
      And because crude oil is the remains of dead organisms I'm recycling those dead organisms.
      It's green all the way!

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    5. Beans, you are in fact correct that the selection of items from Japanese Vending Machines is amazing - sadly in this case, however, outside of several hot/cold drink vending machines and a sole ice cream machine, it was "vending machine desert". Fortunately, I was able to persevere...

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    6. TB - Been there, done that.

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    7. Recycling dinosaurs...

      Now that's green!

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  6. yep....started with a twin blade razor on the scalp in 2002 and haven't looked back since.

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    Replies
    1. The thought has crossed my mind.

      But I look like a zek from the Gulag when I shave my head...

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  7. Road warriors lose their edge when home too much.

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    Replies
    1. 'Tis true!

      (But I so enjoy garrison duty...)

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  8. We don't really have all that much hair anyway!

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, my hair is following my father's pattern, pert near bald on top as I approach 60. Unfortunately, the rest of my body is following my mother's family pattern, which is, well, fat. Fat butt, wide hips, distinguished Gilded Age profile...

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    2. Tuna - When you have so little, it becomes over-rated...

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    3. Beans - I'm sure we are somehow related...

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  9. Tuna beat me to it. My version was "At least what hair you have is soft now."

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  10. At least you have hair to shampoo. That's a win.
    W/R to getting up at night, should see the traffic when a bunch of us geezers get together. There's a cure but you won't like it.
    V/R JWest

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  11. I’ve heard it said, “The Good Lord only made a few perfect heads. On the rest he put hair.”

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    Replies
    1. I imagine my head looks like a dehydrated spud. All the dents, scars and such are covered with ever thinner whispys. I guess as that goes, more will be revealed...

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    2. STxAR - With my head shaved I look like a zek. (See above.)

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  12. What? You mean you don't #2 guard on the old electric hair cutter device and then wash your head with soap?

    I, too, used to flake like a blizzard and used H&S, until the allergist told me to cut it out. Dawn or Palmolive dish soap, or, horrors, regular body soap. And cut that damned hair. (He was an Army Doctor, and had on his I-love-Me wall his award from USAMRIID. And my dad also was bugging me to cut my hair.)

    So, now, the head hair starts curling around the ears and 'bzzzzzmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrrooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwmmmmmmmmmrrrrrrr' it magically goes away. Then into the shower to scrub what weirdness doth abide upstairs on the outside.

    The wife likes it. Says it feels like petting a rabbit or other small animal. Which I assume is a good thing.

    How's the chow situation? Are you eating all three meals aboard ship or what?

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    Replies
    1. We eat where we want. Per diem dontcha know?

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  13. Conditioner is hair grease. No thanks. I make enough of my own. I'm trying to get it OUT. I started just asking for an extra shampoo or two at the motel. Usually no problem to source. Don't push your head through and small openings, Sarge. Unless you have that in your pocket to help with disentanglement.

    I read a story about a guy that didn't have a dental check up from 1945 when he ETS, until the 90's. He used a mop like John mentioned, and tooth picks. Very little in the way of plaque and no gum problems. After I read that, my southern bloodline reared up and bought a box of toothpicks, some of those little reachy flossers, and it was off to the races. I still brush too, but since I started picking my teeth like a yokel, my checkups are easier and quicker. Dentist and I seem to talk about that all the time as she is amazed something so low tech works so well.

    My favorite professor, Dr. Brenner forgot to take underwear on a month long vacation once. He told me he tried to wash them a few times, but finally resorted to turning them inside out until they offended his sensibilities and he buried them in his suitcase. He also mentioned that was the quickest he ever cleared customs after coming back in the US from a month long overseas trip.

    Every setback can be a learning experience. Heh.

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    Replies
    1. Yup, experience is learning from your mistakes!

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  14. And as to getting up every 2-3 hours to do business because one is old? Well, that rule makes me old by the time I was in my teens. Mrs. Andrew is continually surprised at my ability to get up, shamble off, do business, shamble back, get in bed, get face mask and pillows and dog and blankets arranged, all while mostly asleep.

    I keep telling her I got lots of practice when I was young.

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    Replies
    1. I have always had a Volkswagen bladder in a GMC body...

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Just be polite... that's all I ask. (For Buck)
Can't be nice, go somewhere else...

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