Saturday, September 28, 2013


I have been a computer programmer since 1980-something. I find that computers are starting to piss me off more and more.

It's not the machines themselves which are to blame, it's the crappy software loaded on them.

I've noticed that Facebook has been "upgraded" (which is computer-speak for "made to suck more").

I've noticed that Blogger has been "upgraded" as well. Pictures which used to fit nicely on the sidebar now tend to stretch out to the right a bit. I've heard other bloggers mention that and I've seen it on a couple of blogs I follow. Also the comment blocks are different. Not better, just different.

And don't get me started on "smart" phones.

When I got my first one (described here) I was really enjoying it. When trapped on long shopping trips with the female progeny and my better half (my version of Lex's "All Girl Spending Team"), I could spend the time surfing the web. Reading the blogs I follow. Ya know, it was my link to the world outside of Marshalls and Ann Taylor.

But then came the day when I attached my phone to the outside world and AT&T informed me that my software was to be "upgraded" and would I please be patient.

Yup, now my phone sucks in a number of ways.

Seems I need to constantly recharge the damn thing. Got up this morning, disconnected it from the charger, put it in my pocket and began the day. An hour later when I went to make a phone call, the battery was down to 80%!!!

Yes, now the sumbitch sucks down battery power like you wouldn't believe.

(A friend of mine with an iPhone says that the Galaxy has a number of nice features, too bad you need to drag a generator around to keep the battery alive.)

Yeah, I know it's not the hardware itself. It's the blankety-blank what-sodding-idiot-wrote-this-crap software that sucks beyond all belief.

But hey, that's one of those First World problems right?

I comfort myself with the idea that something like SkyNet won't ever come to pass. The constant software upgrades would doom the system about an hour after coming online.


  1. You SIr are a master of your craft. I smiled with fond rememberance at your mention of Lex' all girl spending team and nearly spewed my tasty beverage when I reached the final paragraph. Nailed it, you did.

  2. You speak truth: computers are MUCH more difficult than they need to be. Fanbois will dispute that claim, but I know better.

  3. My cellphone has one app; it's rings. I know you can send and receive text messages. Photos of grandchildren are nice. Otherwise, everything else is a mystery, and likely to remain a mystery.

    My hat is off to all you tech folks. I just don't want to join you.

  4. I used to have a Palm III.
    ...loved it.
    It wore out and I was kinda lost for awhile.
    Now I have a notsosmartphone that does what Palm did, but not so well, and makes phone calls and texts, too ...among other things.
    Yes, it sucks power, but only if I am using it constantly.

    1. Not so smart phone, yup, I has one.

    2. Geez, I keep hitting publish too soon.

      Loved the link to Dr Heckle. That guy cracks me up. (And that was brilliant social commentary!


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